Disney Dreams
by Angelus-v1
Summary: After numerous missions, the team finally gets some much needed down time. But fatigue, junk food, and certain feel food movies get the best of them…and their dreams. Covers the first six team members from season one with their own chapters.
1. Prologue

Disney Dreams

By Michael Lara

Prologue

It had been a long week for the team. Mission after mission seemed to spring up with barely any room for a break between them. Injuries were adding up and fatigue more than sat into each member, which had them all practically begging for rest. Finally, after a thorough mission inspection from Batman and the rest of the league, they were given a much deserved break. To their relief, the League granted them a few days off with the first one being filled with nothing but band-aids, muscle rub, iodine, aspirin, burn cream, gauze, and sleep. The second was designated 'Veg Out Day'.

After a lengthy back and forth discussion on what to do, Wally and M'gann won their way. Robin was the hardest to persuade but after a best of three game of Rock, Paper, Scissors with Wally, he admitted defeat.

"Okay guys and gals," Wally announced as he pulled up a playlist of Disney movies via Netflix. "After very careful consideration, M'gann and I have come up with a variety of cinematic pleasures to tickle your fancies and-"

"What's with the intro?" Robin asked from his place on the smaller of the couches. "Just push play and let the mind numbing begin."

"I'm trying to do something if you don't mind."

"What's that? Trying to be more of a geek than you already are?" Artemis interjected. She had staked out the recliner for herself and was twirling an arrow in her fingers.

"You're just jealous bow girl."

"Of what? The amount of Chicken Whizzes you can eat? It's disgusting watching you almost barf with the amount you stuff in your mouth. But it is funny watching you choke."

"Whatever. It's better than…than… Oh just shut up, I'll come up with something later. As I was saying, we have for your viewing pleasure five, count 'em, five movies to bring back that nostalgic feeling of yesteryear." He paced back and forth before the large flat screen TV with his head held up high in an overdramatic show of pride and importance. "Prepared to be dazzle-ized, surprised, romanticized, dramatized, and-"

"Could someone please shut him up?" Conner yelled from the kitchen where he and M'gann were at.

"That's what we're trying to do!" Artemis yelled back.

"Oh leave him alone," M'gann said.

"For the love of Chicken Whizzes," Robin said as he ran both hands over his face. "Just start the show."

"Kaldur's not back yet, he's putting on more burn ointment." Artemis told him.

"Correction, I have finished my latest application," the Atlantean said as he came back in the room and pulled up a chair.

"Well then," Wally said in a calm, sarcastic tone, "all we need is for **TWO MAKEOUT ARTISTS TO QUIT SUCKING FACE AND BRING IN OUR FOOD SO WE CAN START THE MOVIES!**"

A yelp, undoubtedly M'gann, with the sound of several bowls crashing to the floor, most likely from Conner smashing into them from backing away from her, came from the kitchen as the two teens hurried into the living area with a bowl of popcorn in each hand as several plates of food and drinks floated in behind them. The four waiting heroes hid smirks as the couple came into view. M'gann's hair was slightly disheveled and Conner had some of her lipstick on his mouth. They also had a comical look of guilt on their faces.

"Okay, Artemis, I have the stuffed jalapenos you made right here. They just needed to be heated up," the Martian girl told her. "Kaldur, here are some shrimp puffs. I hope you enjoy them. Wally, candy and popcorn. Robin, taffy and nachos; all of those smell so good, and a chest full of drinks for everyone."

As she mentally handed everyone their orders and set a large igloo cooler in the middle of the room, Conner took his place on the larger of the two couches with a plate of chili dogs and a rootbeer in hand. M'gann joined him with a large pickle in one hand and a Sprite in the other. In no time flat, they had each grabbed a paper plate and began to snack on the large selection of food and gulp down the soft drinks while the movies played.

After several hours, stuffed bellies and fatigue took them over and all were asleep where they sat. The TV displayed the Netflix menu with the Disney movies they selected and finished but didn't make a sound. Everything was quiet except for a few snores. Robin was sleeping with his legs perched up on the back rest of his occupied couch with his sunglasses slightly askew on his face. Artemis was snoozing in her recliner with what was left of her third can of Sprite spilling on the carpet. Kaldur was resting his head on his folded arms as he leaned on the back support of his chair. Drool puddled on the floor at his feet near Wally who was sleeping on the floor with a bowl of popcorn gently rising and falling on his stomach. Conner was slouched on the couch with M'gann as her head rested on his shoulder and his face part way shrouded in her hair.

With the combination of fatigue, junk food, and fantasy movies, each team member began to dream. What they dreamt about was so incredibly out there that for some, it was completely opposite of their personalities. Others dreamt of something closer to who they were. And then there was Wally.

**AN: Please don't ask me where this came from or how this got in my head. It just came out of my twisted mind as I was writing another one of my stories. But by all means, please enjoy the ride.**


	2. Finding Tula

Finding Tula

It was a bright sunny day, or as bright and sunny as being under water could be, as two clownfish, a red and blue stripped one with yellow fins, and a yellow and green striped one admired their new home among the Great Barrier Reef.

"So, Tula, when you said you wanted an ocean view, you didn't think that we we're gonna get the whole ocean, did you? A fish can breathe out here. Did your man deliver or did he deliver?" Kal-lin asked his wife.

"My man delivered," Tula answered while rolling her eyes. "You did good. And the neighborhood is awesome. But do we really need so much space?"

"Tula, honey, think of our kids. They deserve the best. Look, look, look. They'll wake up, poke their little heads out and they'll see a whale! See, right by their bedroom win…dow."

Looking out into the ocean, Kal-lin saw a dark shape skimming on the water's surface. The closer it got, the bigger it became until it came to a stop above them.

"Kal-lin? What's that?" Tula asked.

"I, don't know." He wanted to get a closer look but dared to not get any closer than he had to. "Tula, get back in-"

A loud splash sounded through the water and a blanket of bubbles descended into the water. It didn't take long for them to float back to the surface and when they did, they revealed a dark figure the two knew was a human. It didn't take long for the human to zero in on the clownfish and swim towards them, pulling out a net as he did so.

"Tula, run!" Kal-lin yelled as he and his wife fled back into the reef.

Everything happened so fast that he and Tula lost each other as the human crashed through parts of the reef. The metal and nylon net jutted in and out of every conceivable opening to gather them up. Kal-lin came close to being caught a time or two but managed to get clear just in time before the net was pulled back.

"Kal-lin! Help me!" Tula screamed.

"I'm coming, Tula!" he yelled back.

By the time he got to where she was, all he found was their home destroyed. Calling her name franticly, he heard, just barely, Tula calling for him to help her. Swimming as fast as he could, Kal-lin tried to reach the human whose net contained his wife, but was too late. His wife's captor had finished climbing into the boat above and began to take off.

"Oh no. No, no. It's gone, it's gone. No, no, it can't be gone. No, no! Tula! Tula! Tula! No! Tula! Tula! No! No, please, no! No, no!"

Pouring on all the speed he could muster, Kal-lin tried in vain to catch up to the boat but quickly fell behind.

"Wait!" he yelled. "Come back! Come ba-"

"Look out!" a voice screamed from his left.

Not paying attention, Kal-lin crashed into a female Regal green tang fish and tumbled through the water. "Ooh, ooh. She's gone, she's gone…"

"Um, no, I'm right here," the green fish said.

"No, not you. The boat," Kal-lin told her.

"What boat?"

"The boat that I was chasing."

"The boat you were just chasing?"

"Yes, the boat I was just chasing. What else could I be talking about?"

"Well, I don't know," the green fish said. "You could talk about how pink the reefs are, how the ocean water tastes like salt, how it's always warm around the younger fishes when the rest of the water is cold, or-"

"No, no, I'm looking for a white boat I was just chasing before I ran into you."

"Oh, I've seen a white boat!"

"You have?"

"Yeah, you were just chasing it before our little wreck. Duh." She made dumbfounded face on the last word.

"Sorry about that, but I just need to know where it went. He took my wife and I need to find her." Kal-lin explained

"Who took your wife?"

"The human that was down here."

"Human? If a human took your wife than why are you chasing a boat?"

"No, the human took my wife and got in the boat, so I need to find the boat to get my wife back or I'll never see her again."

The green fish floated there in front of him for a minute without saying a word.

"Well?" Kal-lin asked urgently.

"Whale? Where?" She turned quickly and looked around her but was disappointed when one wasn't present.

"No! Not 'whale', 'well', as in 'Well? Which direction did you see the boat got?"

"Oh! Of course, why didn't you say so? Come on, follow me!" She took off behind and to the right of him at a fast pace.

"Wait, what?" Swimming fast, Kal-lin caught up to the green fish and swam beside her.

"What are you doing?"

"What are you doing?" she asked.

"What?" Kal-lin's expression was one of confusion as the green fish repeated his words.

"Why are you following me, huh? You got a problem, buddy? Huh? Huh? I have a boyfriend that could bust you up, you want that to happen? Do 'ya? Do 'ya? Do 'ya? You want a piece of me? Yeah, oooh, I'm scared now. Whaat!?"

"A problem? I don't even know you. I-"

"M'ry"

"What?

"My name's M'ry. Hey, aren't you after a human in a boat because they kidnapped your wife?"

"Is there something wrong with you?" Kal-lin yelled. "I don't have time for jokes. I know that's strange coming from a clownfish, but I just need you to show me where they went."

"Oh, well, I have short term memory loss, runs in my family, whoever they are, do you know them, I think I have a large family but I'm not sure, although it could be small but I doubt it, what's your name, my name's M'ry but I already told you that, at least I think I did, although I could be wrong again as I have short term memory loss, runs in my family, whoever they are, do you know them, I think I have a large family but I'm not sure although it could be small but I doubt it, what's your name, my name's M'ry but I already told you that, at least I think I did, although I could be wrong again as I have short term memory loss, runs in my family, whoever they are-"

"M'ry, stop. You're going in circles."

"Oh sorry. As I said I have short term- oh, Hello M'ry, I don't know your name. You can tell me while we find your wife after we find the boat, come on."

"Uh, ok. My name's Kal-lin…but how are we gonna find the boat? It's so far away. How can we hope to-"

"We'll ask my friend Con," M'ry said as they swam further into the ocean. "He's my boyfriend who doesn't know he's my boyfriend but thinks he's only my friend while still being my boyfriend because he luuuuuuvs me and I luuuuuuuuv him so I'm his girlfriend and he's my boyfriend and…"

Kal-lin knew this was gonna be a long trip.

After several hours of swimming, Kal-lin and M'ry arrived at a sunken ship covered in deep sea grime. Sand covered the inside and various sea life grew on the walls, making it a spooky environment overall. And it so happened they were headed right for it.

"This is where your boyfriend lives?" Kal-lin asked.

"Yup. And one day it'll just be me and him." Shooting ahead, M'ry was the first to enter the ship with a wary Kal-lin bringing up the rear.

"M'ry? M'ry? Where did you go?" Carefully and quietly, Kal-lin swam a foot at a time deeper into the sunken vessel when he heard a deep thump behind him. "M'ry? Is that you?"

"Who wants to know?" said a deep voice behind Kal-lin.

Scrunching up his body in fear, the little clownfish shook in terror at the deep voice and slowly turned around. His eyes grew wide at the sight of a large great white shark with a brooding face and narrowed eyes staring back at him.

"Hello," the shark said with his razor sharp teeth showing.

"Con!" M'ry yelled as she swam up hugged him with her small flippers.

"Tha…that's your boy…boyfriend?" Kal-lin frightfully asked.

"Hello Kal-lin, of course he is." She smiled at him. "I like his fins." At her words, Con seemed to blush slightly.

"Well it's about time." from the opposite direction, a green female mako shark with a yellow dorsal fin swam up to them, much to the terror of Kal-lin. "And who's this?"

"Artem, this is my friend, Kal-lin. Kal-lin, Artem," M'ry said.

"Well, the more the merrier. Come on Con, let's get this over with."

"Oh, oh, right. M'ry, Kal-lin, please follow us," Con told the two smaller fish as he led them deeper into the ship.

Once they arrived in what was the storage area in the hull of the ship, Con cleared his throat. "Right, then. This meeting has officially come to order. Let us all say the pledge…"

At the same time, Con, Artem, and M'ry began to recite their pledge. "'I am a nice shark, not a mindless killing machine. If I am to change this image, I must first change myself. Fish are friends, not food. We protect them from other sharks who wish to do them harm. Except stinkin' dolphins."

"Dolphins! Yeah," Artem said. "They think they're sooo cute! 'Hey, look at me. I'm a flippin' little dolphin! Let me flip for 'ya! Ain't I something? God, I hate dolphins!"

"Right, dolphins don't count," Con agreed. "And the same goes for sea-monkeys. I hate sea monkeys. Now, would our clownfish friend like to add something?"

"Me?" Kal-lin asked." "I don't have a problem."

"Denial," Artem said.

"No, no, not denial. See I'm looking for my wife who was kidnapped by a human and I really must be going so I-" Backing up, Kal-lin bumped into a rusting piece of pipe that set off a chain reaction with other pieces of metal that eventually struck M'ry.

"Oh, my nose!" Grabbing her nose, M'ry winced from the pain as Kal-lin rushed to check on her. "You really clocked me there."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to."

"You hurt M'ry!" Con yelled as an angry sneer crossed his face.

"Villain!" Artem shouted. "Get 'em!"

"No, no I, AHHHHHHHH!"

In just the nick of time, Kal-lin dodged being eaten by Con as his massive jaws shut with a loud clash. Looking for a way out, he shot for a crack in the hull only to be met by Artem who also tried to eat him. It was bedlam as the clownfish did his best to stay out of their hungry, vengeful mouths. Old suit cases, wardrobe, life preservers, wooden shelves and many more foreign objects were tossed around them as the two sharks tried to punish the clownfish for hurting their friend.

"No, wait, please," Kal-lin begged as he was backed into a corner by Con. "I can explain. See, it was an accident and I, AHHH PLEASE DON'T EAT ME!"

Rearing back to swallow the tiny clownfish in a single bite, Con bared his razor sharp teeth and shot forward to finish Kal-lin off when M'ry smacked him on the nose. "Ow! What was that for?" he demanded.

"That was for trying to eat my friend," she told him.

"But-"

"But nothing. It was an accident. Now tell him you're sorry."

"But I-"

"Tell him."

Looking down and shifting his eyes back and forth, Con mumbled something incoherently.

"Con?!"

"Sorry."

"Do you mean it?"

"I suppose."

"Okay. Now what were we here for? Oh, hello M'ry, we need to find a white boat and human that has Kal-lin's wife. Have you or Artem seen one like that?"

"As a matter of fact, I saw one pull into Happy Harbor before coming here," Artem told her. "It's far from here so you may need Wrush to help you."

"Wrush?" Kal-lin asked.

"He's a sea turtle who's really fast." Con informed him. "M'ry knows how to find him. He can take you to Happy Harbor in no time flat."

"When you see him, tell him Artem sent 'ya," the mako told them.

After leaving in search for Wrush, Kal-lin reflected on something M'ry said. It was strange that she seemed to remember things when she added 'hello' before a name. It must trigger something in her mind to help her remember things.

"Um, M'ry?"

"S'up?"

"I want you to try something for me. First, can you tell me if you have a large or small family?"

"Oh, I have a…hm, I don't know. It's kinda hard for me to remember because I have short-term mem-"

"Yes, I know. Now, before you answer the question, the same question, say 'Hello M'ry'. Got it?"

"What for?"

"Just humor me. Now, do you have a large family?"

"Hm, I…Hello M'ry…(gasp) I can remember! I have a large family! A big, big family! I can remember them!"

"Just as I thought. Every time you need to remember something, say 'Hello M'ry" and you'll remember it."

"That's genius! Hello M'ry. (Gasp) I can remember my birthday! Hello M'ry. (Gasp) I'm the youngest of all my sisters! Hello M'ry. (Gasp) I like to…"

It went on and on like this for quite some time.

It didn't take long for Kal-lin and M'ry to find Wrush, a yellow and red sea turtle. Conversation wasn't anything special as he added 'dude' multiple times per sentence.

"Dude, so, like, dude, if you, like, wanna, like, rescue your little fish lady dude, you wanna look for a dude named Rob. The dude's a red seagull and, like, he's the dude you want to help you out, dude."

"Where do we find him?" Kal-lin asked.

"Dude, he like, flies around the docked ships in the harbor. He also tends to laugh like some dude who has to laugh…a lot. And the dude may annoy you with that, but the dude id is like, a totally cool dude. You get that brah?"

"Yeah, I get it." Kal-lin told him.

After reaching Happy Harbor, Wrush wished them farewell and the duo searched for the seagull in question. Sure enough, his cackle gave him away among the flock of seagulls he was in. Plus, he was the only red one to boot. Unfortunately, the others took notice of the two fish and wanted to partake in the meal before them. They began to squawk 'mine' upon seeing them when Rob noticed who they were and quckly made his way to them.

"Don't make any sudden moves. I know who you are. You can call me Rob. Now I need you to hop inside my mouth if you want to live." Rob told them.

"Hop in your mouth? And how does that make me live?" Kal-lin asked.

"Because I can get you to safety and take you to your wife. You two just need to trust me."

"How do you-"

"My dad has connections everywhere. She's a yellow and green clownfish, answers to the name Tula. There's nothing my dad doesn't know. He knows where she is, in a tank at a dentist's office named B. Manta. I'll take you to her while he gets her out. Now calmly, get in mouth and we'll casually fly where they're-"

"MINE!" the seagulls yelled in unison.

With no other choice, Kal-lin and M'ry hopped into Rob's mouth and hung on to the edge of his beak as he engaged in a game of cat and mouse with the other seagulls. It was insane some of the stunts he would pull. Barrel rolls, spins, loops, dives, banks, even flying between the closely docked boats, it was as if he were completely fearless. Or insane from the amount of cackling he was letting loose. Eventually, he had managed to lose them by flying through an entanglement of ropes and pulleys responsible for keeping the different sails of the ships up.

"Told 'ya I would keep you alive," Rob said as he ventured to where his dad told him to meet up.

As Rob landed on the pier where B. Manta's office was, he dropped Kal-lin and M'ry back in the water when a shadow overcame them. Looking up, they saw for a brief moment a tall, dark seagull looking down upon them. In the time it took for them to blink, it was gone.

"Was that your-" M'ry tried to ask.

"Yep. He does that a lot," Rob replied with a cackle.

"Kal-lin!" Tula called from behind them.

"Tula?" he yelled back. "Tula!"

The two fish reunited as Rob and M'ry looked on with large smiles.

"So I guess you'll be heading back," Rob said.

"Yep, my job here is done." M'ry said. "Now I'll be going…going…wait, where am I going? Hello M'ry, oh yeah that's it, back to Con's because I luuuuv him, and luuuuuuuvs me, and I…"

With a cackle, Rob was gone.

The trio swam back out of the harbor where Kal-lin introduced his wife Tula to M'ry and explained how she helped him rescue her. Tula was amazed at the long journey her husband took to find her. A large school of fish gathered around them as they continued to swim out into the open ocean, none noticed a large net descending from above until it was too late. Before they knew it, they were all captured with a great deal of the other fish and panic set into the entire group, all except for Tula and Kal-lin who managed to escape the net before it could trap them.

"No, no, no! No! M'ry!" Kal-lin yelled.

"Help! Get us out! Aaaaaaaah!" M'ry shouted as she and the others were being drug away by a large fishing boat on the surface.

"We have to tell all the fish to swim down together! It's the only way we can save M'ry!" Tula shouted.

"Right," Kal-lin said.

Together, the clownfish swam up to the captured fish and told them what to do. As if they were of one mind, the large group of fish began to work together to gain freedom but it was still not enough. The boat, which had tipped slightly to its side, was slowly righting itself back up.

"Don't give up! Keep swimming! Just keep swimming!" Kal-lin encouraged.

"Harder! Just keep swimming! Keep swimming!" Tula ordered.

"It's not working!" M'ra shouted.

Just when it seemed hopeless, a loud thud thundered through the water. Before Kal-lin and his wife could see what it was, the trapped fish yelled 'SHARKS' as another thud sounded off.

"Sharks?" Tula said with a frightened voice.

"Con, Artem! Don't worry, they're here to help" Kal-lin told Tula. "Guys, I need you to keep slamming the sides so the fish can rip through the net!"

"Gotcha!" Artem shouted as she and Con rammed the side of the fishing boat again.

Every impact to the boat sent it further on its side. The men on the ship panicked when they saw the dorsal fins of the mako and great white with the thought of being eaten alive coursing through their heads. The fish and M'ra swam as hard as they could until with one final hit, the fishing boat capsized and the net opened up. As one, the fish spilt out and shouted 'freedom' as Kal-lin and Tula searched for M'ra. It didn't take long to find her swimming around Con as he and Artem came up to them.

"My boyfriend saaaaaaved me, because he luuuuuvs me and I luuuuuuv him and he…" Her sing song voice carried on happily as she continued swimming around her boyfriend.

"Thank you, my friends," Kal-lin told Con and Atrem as M'ra continued her singing. "I couldn't have gotten my wife back if it wasn't for you two, Rob, Wrush, and M'ra."

"No problem," Con told him.

"It's our job to help others." Artem said.

Waking up with a start, Kaldur rubbed his sleep filled eyes. The first thing he sees is the bright screen of the TV as he stretched and popped his back from leaning on the chair for so long. With a grunt, he stood up, and was careful not to wake the others as he wiped his mouth of the residual drool.

"No more Nemo," he said as he heads to an empty room in the mountain. "No more Nemo, ever."


	3. The Cowl in the Stone

The Cowl in the Stone

6th century Gotham City

The King of Gotham, Bruce Wayne has passed. The kingdom no longer has a ruler and now, the criminal element has slowly begun to creek back into the lives of its people. With no heir of his own, there is only one way to choose a king suitable to rule the once thriving city. One man, one man alone must pass a test. A test not of strength, but of heart.

_Who so ever pulls the cowl from the stone,_

_Is rightly the one and only king born of the Kingdom of Gotham._

None succeed in removing the cowl and it is soon forgotten. The Kingdom of Gotham as such, has been left to the dark ages.

Many years later…

While on a hunting trip with his elder brother, a teenager donned in red and green clothing, by the name of Richard hastily searched for an arrow he was responsible for making his brother, Sir Conalot lose after he made him miss shooting a deer. Given the direction the wind blew and the distance Conalot drew his bow back, Richard estimated it flew approximately one hundred and twenty five yards into the woods. The darkest part of the woods that is, where an old shack stood.

Wanting to pass it by, but knowing this area could be where his brother's arrow landed, Richard hesitantly knocked on the door when he heard an explosion occur inside.

"Confound it!" came a voice from the other side. "Dark ages indeed! No plumbing, no electricity. Oh hang it all, hang it all. Who's that at the door? WHAT?"

Bursting the door open, a red haired man in a yellow wizard's cloak looked down on the young boy. His eyes widened as if he were an old friend.

"Oh, it's you, my dear lad. Come in, come in, you're rather late."

"Um, what?" Richard asked.

"You're late. You were supposed to be here an hour ago, now come right on in."

"Whoa, you seem be mistaking me for someone else. I don't know who you are and I'm pretty sure I've never met you before."

"That's right, you haven't. Well then, My name is Walin, the greatest of all scientific wizards. And you are my student, Richard of the Grayson's. Now that we have all that out of the way, on with your training."

"Training for what?" Richard asked. A quick look around him saw the small shack full of books, chemicals, and papers full of mad scribbling that made absolutely no sense whatsoever to him as they were so poorly written by such notorious handwriting.

"Why, to be king of course," Walin said as if it were painfully obvious.

"King? I'm not a king. I'm not even a prince. I'm a squire for my brother who's a knight and I need to-"

"Find his arrow?" Walin held up the special hunting arrow Sir Conalot shot and waived it around.

"How did you-"

"Come with me and I'll show you. Kalimedes, come along now."

Emerging from a high mounted bird house, a blue and red flying fish flew down and joined the two. "You called?"

"He can talk?" Richard asked, astonished.

"Of course he can talk, he's magic. Now off we go!" Pulling out a hand full of dust, Walin threw it on the ground before him. "BAZINGA!" The three vanished with a bright flash.

An instant later, the trio appeared in the court of Sir Pennyworth, Richard's foster father.

"My goodness, what's this now? Young Richard of the Grayson's? Is that you?" Sir Pennyworth asked.

"Now, now, now, we haven't much time to waste," Walin said. "I am Walin, the most powerful scientific wizard in all the land and I am here to train your boy not in magics, but in education."

"I dare say, you've got him under a spell. Well it will not work I need him here to help run the castle. A boy needs strict rules to adhere to and I will make sure he-"

"Oh rules, shmules," Kalimedes said from his perch on Walin's shoulder. "Rules were meant to be broken if they are for the greater good."

"A flying fish that talks?" Sir Pennyworth exclaimed. "A real honest to goodness talking flying fish?"

"Not only can he speak, but he is highly educated," Walin pointed out. "He graduated from M.I.T."

"Please Sir Pennyworth?" Richard asked with a puppy pout face and his hands clamped under his chin. "Can you let him teach me like he teaches his flying fish? No doubt I'll be smarter than Kalimedes because I'm not a fish with a bird brain."

"Hey!" the owl snapped. "Not funny."

"Oh, all right, Just have him back by tomorrow, we're going to see your brother wed Lady Megavire and go onto compete in the tournament to see who is worthy of ruling the kingdom of Gotham."

"Don't worry about a thing, I'll take good care of your boy. And as a parting gift…" With a wave of a small, hand held wand, a bolt of lightning flashed out of its end and proceeded to wrap itself around Sir Pennyworth before floating above the court and forming into a large bat. "This will be the symbol of the king. Keep an eye out for it and you will know who truly rules the land."

An instant later, after Walin yelled 'BAZINGA', he, Richard, and Kalimedes were gone.

Appearing in the castle moat, Richard found himself underwater. The first thought that goes through his mind is not being able to breathe. He begins to panic and tries to swim to the surface but is too far underwater to reach it in time.

"Air! Air! I'm drowning! Drain the moat I'm drowning!"

"Excuse me, but why are you in a panic?" Walin asked as he swam above him.

"Because I'm drowning!"

"Take a look at your arms, or fins I should say."

Looking down at his fins, Richard was taken aback by the sight of fins taking the place of his hands. He continued to look himself over and saw a tail in place of his legs.

"I'm…I'm a fish?"

"That's right, you're a fish. Now, if you'll pay attention, I'll show you why I did this for you."

The two swam a ways until Walin came to a sudden stop. Richard on the other hand continued to float forwards despite ceasing to swim anymore. "Hey, how can you stop and I can't?"

"You are in between two worlds, my lad. The surface and the floor. In between lies an area where it is easy to see an objects path. You see, anything with movement continues to move forward until it collides with another object. Or is drained of its momentum by friction. You just experienced both."

"But what does this have to do with my training?"

"Glad you asked, dear boy. Wait right here and pay attention."

Swimming down to the floor of the moat, the fish Walin summoned a rock to rise before him and gave it a hard smack with his tail. The small stone shot forward, leaving a near invisible trail behind it until it came in contact with a stick and forced it to topple over.

"See, even an object as small as that rock can topple something large. Remember, brawn is not always as important as brains are."

"But you used brawn by hitting the stick with the rock."

"Yes I did, but look where I hit it."

Doing as he said, Richard looked carefully at the fallen stick and saw where the rock had struck it. There was a dent in the upper part of it where its weakest point was. A thin line, evident of it being broken could be seen clearly.

"You hit it in its weak spot."

"Precisely. Everything and everyone had a weakness and sometimes the smallest things can make a difference in success, or failure. You must learn to identify when to use brawn over brains and how to recognize a weakness."

"Uh, can you tell me something, Walin?" Richard asked while backing up slightly.

"Of course, what is it lad?"

"What's the weakness for a crocodile?"

"A what now?"

Looking behind him, Walin saw a large green crocodile bare its teeth before dashing after him. With a yelp, the two fish swam as fast as they could to escape the hungry mouth of the predatory reptile.

"Jumping Jehoshaphat!" Walin yelled as he and Richard looked for a place to hide.

"I think I have an idea!" Richard yelled as he took off in a separate direction.

"Where are you going, lad?!"

"To use my brains!"

Seeing the smaller of the two fish break off, the crocodile changed course and followed the one it believed to be the weakest. Richard swam around a support beam used for supporting the draw bridge when it was down and found what he was looking for. On the moat's floor sat an old shield and spear he had dropped several months ago and never picked up. He was glad he hadn't done so as the broken spearhead gave him an idea.

Grabbing the fragmented weapon with his mouth, he charged the crocodile and managed to lodge it in its jagged toothed mouth. The predator jerked its head back and forth in an effort to dislodge it but had a great difficulty in doing so.

"Ha ha! That's really using your brain, boy! Do you get the point of the lesson now?"

"Sure do, now he does too. He should really try to stay whelmed."

"What's that now?"

"Nothing. Is the lesson over yet?"

"It is now hang on, we're getting out of-"

Before Walin could answer, the crocodile returned after breaking the spear tip and smashed into both he and Richard. Walin shot out of the water and crashed on the shore, returning to his human form as Richard tried his best to come to a stop in the water. He immediately gave that up when he saw the crocodile rushing towards him with its mouth wide open.

"Walin!" he cried as he broke the surface. "Walin, help! Kalimedes! Help me! Please!"

Waking up from a nap, Kalimedes smacked his fishy lips a few times as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes when he notices Richard as a fish. Acting without hesitation, he takes off at full flight and snatches the little fish from the impending jaws of the crocodile.

"Kalimedes! You're…you're…"

Looking down, he could see the water pass below them and Kalimedes skimming the surface.

"I call it 'surfing'. It's gonna be - AAAGGGGHHHHHHH!" Before he could finish his sentence, the crocodile leapt out of the water a few feet before the two and forced the flying fish to slide to a stop inches from the waiting teeth primed to snap shut on him and Richard.

"KALIMEDES!" Richard screamed just as the jaws snapped shut.

The flying fish had managed to move a split second before they were made into a meal and got back on dry land. Skidding to a stop, the two were now covered in mud and loose grass when another flash over took them with the words 'BAZINGA!" being yelled. The next second, they were in a tree with Richard in the guise of a red furred squirrel.

"What…what's going on? Why are we in a tree? And why am I a squirrel?"

Appearing behind him, an orange furred Walin skittered out of a hole in the trunk of the tree and ran over to the small red squirrel. "What's going on is a lesson in gravity. The reason we're in a tree is to help teach you about gravity. And the reason you're a squirrel is, well, how else will you learn about gravity unless you're one of the creatures who defy it on a daily basis?"

It took some getting used to, but eventually Richard learned how to maneuver on four legs. He was soon leaping from tree branch to tree branch with Walin following behind. He learned quickly about judging his jumps and look before he leaps. Richard was even instructed on how to use gravity to his advantage and not be a victim of it.

Everything was going smoothly until an unwanted visitor happened along. A small red female squirrel happened by the duo and took an immediate liking to the younger of the two. What started as a small annoyance, turned into a major distraction as she refused to let up chasing him around.

"Walin, why won't she leave me alone?" Richard yelled as he fled from the adamant she-squirrel.

"Well it's the most peculiar thing," Walin said as he sat back and watched the two scuttle back and forth at a fast rate. "It seems she likes you, dear boy."

"Likes me? But I'm a boy, not a squirrel!" He was forced to come to a stop as the female squirrel popped in front of him and gave him a peck on the nose. "Stop that! Leave me alone. Walin, turn me back!"

"Oh, just enjoy it, boy. As long as you remember what I told you about gravity, you should manage to stay one step ahead of her at all times."

The two squirrels continued running through the limbs with Kalimedes and Walin laughing their heads off.

"She's gaining on you, Richie!" Kalimedes said from his place in the tree.

"There's no sensible explanation, for this co-boom-eration, its the most un-logical, most illogical, most confuseley, most bamboozleley, most bemutling, most mind fuddling thing." As Walin continued his mocking, he didn't notice a white and green animal keeping his eyes on the activity in the tree.

Landing on an old, dead branch, Richard was taken by surprise as it cracked under his weight and crashed to the ground. Pinning his tail underneath, the branch was keeping him in place and refused to let him go. As he struggled to get free, the stalking animal made himself known and jumped from its hiding spot in the bushes.

"(Gasp) Walin! Help! It's a Joker Jackal!" Renewing his struggle to get free was pointless as the Joker Jackal held the branch down with a mighty paw and licked its lips at the sight of the meal before him.

At the sight of the young male squirrel in trouble, the female squirrel charged down from the tree and attacked the Joker Jackal's leg. Using her sharp teeth, she bit down hard several times, forcing the predatory animal to relinquish its prey and chase after its female attacker. It didn't count on her being so agile and smart as she led it to the edge of a cliff and dodged its attack at just the right moment, causing the Joker Jackal to plummet over the edge and into several large boulders and fallen logs before landing in the river below. To add insult to injury, one of the fallen logs fell on the jackal and encased it in a way where it couldn't get free. The Joker Jackal had no choice but to float downstream and eventually fall over the high waterfall at its end.

"Stop squirming, my boy and give me a second," the now human Walin said. "We really should get you a hook with a rope attached to it in case this happens again." With a wave of his hand, and another 'BAZINGA!', Richard returned to his true form.

"Oh, thank you, Walin. Tha-" Looking behind where his wizard friend stood, Richard saw the red female squirrel looking back at him. Even though he was human now, he felt as if she knew who he was. Especially when her lip quivered and she ran up the nearest tree into a hollowed out section of it.

"I shouldn't have let this go on as far as it did. I was trying to turn you back after you fell to the ground but needed to turn myself back as well. There was something else I wanted you to learn involving that little squirrel. What she felt for you was extremely powerful. She proved that by risking her life for yours."

"But she didn't know me. She just liked me, she…oh." Taking one last look at where the female squirrel vanished to, Richard got back to his feet and dusted himself off. "So, that thing you wanted me to learn, it's more powerful than gravity?"

"Yes. In fact, it's the most powerful force in the universe. It can be between people who do not know one another and are only there to help, or it can be strengthened when it's between two people who truly feel that way about each other."

The next day Richard woke early to continue his training with Walin. After a quick visit to see his elder brother, Sir Conalot and promising him he'll be back in time for his wedding, he joined the wizard and Kalimedes on the wall of the castle's courtyard.

"Today's lesson will be taught to you by Kalimedes here. After all, in order to succeed in life, one must learn to fly," Walin explained as he walked ahead of him.

"Fly?" Richard asked. "But I can't-"

"Oh of course you can. BAZINGA!" A puff of smoke engulfed Richard of the Grayson's and once cleared, revealed him to be a red robin.

"Oh, goody, you made him a bird fit for flying. Well I'm a fish fit for gliding," Kalimedes told the wizard.

"Just teach him, please."

"(Sigh) Very well. Come, boy. Let the lesson begin."

Leading the transformed lad to the edge of the wall, Kalimedes explained how birds fly by showing Richard how to spread his wings properly before attempting to glide. It took only once for him to actually do so and soon the two were flying and gliding through the countryside. Both lost track of time as well as their way and soon found themselves being chased by a hawk. Looking for a safe place to hide, Richard flew into a forest while Kalimedes took refuge in a lake deep enough to hide from the airborne attacker. While not paying attention to where he was going, Richard crashed through a window and into a cottage where a young man lived.

"Why, who do we have here?" the young man in a blue cloak asked the small bird. "You're a strange one, aren't you?"

"Richard tried to speak to him but all that came out was a chirp. His eyes widened when he realized the only ones who could understand him were Walin the Wizard and Kalimedes.

"I have to say, I don't get many visitors my way." Nonchalauntly, the man stood and made his way over to the window the bird flew in through. "Part of that is because I have certain…tastes, you might say." He licked his lips hungrily. "Another part of it is…" He then morphed into an orange and black cat with red eyes. "The forest animals know better than to come around here!"

With a hiss, the transformed man pounced on the robin and narrowly missed him. Again and again he tried to capture him in his claws but the bird was proving to be too nimble for him. The bird kept his distance from the cat by using what he had learned from Walin. Brains kept him from becoming a meal as he lured the hungry animal into various objects in the house. Gravity came into play as he used the cat's momentum to send it tumbling end over end when it got too eager and didn't watch its step as it pounced on a delicately balanced cupboard and went crashing to the floor. It was a relief when Walin came bursting in the cottage and put an end to the whole mess.

"Richard? Ri- there you…YOU!" Walin said as he stopped dead in his tracks and eyed the cat. "Klarion. So this is where you were banished to."

Turning back into his human form, the young man known as Klarion stomped over to Walin. "Walin? You are the one responsible for my being here. How dare you step foot in my dwelling."

"I'm responsible? You were the one who tried to take over Starfish City. I merely suggested the banishment."

"And now, you will die for it!"

Faster than Walin could prepare, the evil Klarion tackled him out the door. The two wrestled as Richard flew outside to see the scuffle. He was greeted by a sight that scared him to his core. With one strong shove, Klarion kicked Walin away and sent him tumbling on his backside. A purple mist then surrounded the banished wizard and he transformed into a large orange sea dragon complete with horns and a spiked tail.

"Come on, kid, we gotta get outta here!" Shaking him out of his fright, Kalimedes drug him away from the battle.

"But, but-" Richard tried to say.

"No 'but's, we gotta go. Walin's fighting a dragon and he knows how to get rid of them. So trust me, we do not want to be anywhere near when he takes Klarion out."

Rearing his head back, the dragonfied Klarion unleashed a torrent of fire on his foe. It was so incredibly hot that it was able to singe the feathers of the fleeing birds. Thinking quickly, Walin reached for his wand and took a swipe at the fire from the bottom up. A large wave of water shot out of it and formed a wall to put out the fire. A large blanket of steam exploded from the two elements colliding, so much so that they couldn't tell who was where.

Acting first, Klarion cleared out the steam with a mighty breath and grabbed the wizard before he could defend himself.

"Hoo, hoo, hoo, I win, I win!" Klarion called out as he mashed his hands together to grind Walin into nothing.

"Walin!" Richard yelled. "I'll peck his eyes out!"

"Wait, it's not over yet," Kalimedes said while dragging him back.

Opening his hands to see the smeared stain known as Walin the wizard, Klarion was taken by surprise when he found nothing in his hands. "Wha…what is this?"

"You wanted to catch me? Well my congratulations, you did just that." Walin said, seemingly from everywhere but was only heard by Klarion.

"Where are you?!"

"Inside your body of course. You see, I'm a germ. A particularly nasty one at that, which is very deadly to dragons called, Bazingalitaloptereosis."

"What? Get out of me!"

"Too late."

Instantly, Klarion began to break out in spots over his entire body. A sensation of hot followed by cold came next with uncontrollable sneezing afterward.

"No! This can't be happening!" Klarion yelled.

"You want the cure?" Walin asked. "Then turn back into your normal self and it won't kill you."

Klarion did as Walin told him and was spared from his deadly fate. Walin in the meantime had turned back into his normal form and dusted himself off.

"You'll be fine in a few weeks. However, you still carry the Bazingalitaloptereosis disease in you. You can never turn into a dragon again without killing yourself."

"I'll get even with you," Klarion shouted as went back to his cottage. "I'll get even with you yet!"

"Oh stuff it in your butt, witch boy." Walin retorted.

"Walin, that was amazing!" Richard shouted as he flew up to the wizard. He was then turned back into his youthful self once again.

"Great thinking," Kalimedes added.

"Thank you, my friends," Walin said. "I think training is complete for today. We should be getting back to the castle to-"

"The castle," Richard said with a start. "My brother's wedding. The tournament, I missed it!" He began to run in the direction he thought the castle was in.

"Richard, come back. I can teleport us all to the castle in an instant"

"They won't be at the castle. They're in London by now!"

"Then to London we shall go. BAZINGA!" The three vanished into a cloud of mist once again.

After arriving in London, Richard took off as fast as he could down the streets. He bounded over any obstacle in his path, not realizing he was incorporating all the lessons Walin had taught him. He reached the church first but found it empty. He next tried the square where the tournament was being held and it was there where he found his brother preparing himself by donning his red and black armor with his wife, Lady Megavire in her white and red dress, helping him out.

"Conalot, I-"

"Richard?" Conalot asked as he ran up to his younger brother. "Where have you been. You missed the wedding and the tournament is about to start."

"I'm sorry but I-"

"Did you at least bring my helmet?"

"I…no. No. I forgot."

"I trusted you," Sir Conalot said disappointed. "I trusted you and you let me down. You were supposed to be there for me like I have been there for you."

"Conalot?" Lady Megavire asked. "What will you do now?"

"I forfeit. I have to forfeit. My brother and squire was supposed to keep my helmet for me and he forgot it. The Green Knight will now become the ruler of Gotham, not that I wanted the job anyways."

"What do you mean?"

"I'm not a leader, Megavire. I'm a fighter. I was just doing this because it was the right thing to do."

"No, no, you will. I, I, I, I, I'll get you a sword, just, just stall them for a minute." Running back outside, Richard was now determined to make amends with his brother and new sister-in-law.

"Richard? Where are you going in such a hurry, lad?" Walin asked as the youth ran by.

"A helmet," he answered. "I need a helmet."

"There's one over there," Kalimedes pointed out. "It looks as if someone left it in that garden."

Heading off to where the flying fish indicated, Richard found the helmet. It had two spikes on either side of its top and covered all but the eyes and mouth. He pulled it out quite easily from the weeds and…

_Legend has it that young Richard of the Grayson's was adorned in a bright light as if from heaven. A crowd gathered around him with the wizard Walin, his flying fish, Sir Conalot and his wife, as well as the Green Knight among the first. Despite the Green Knight revealing herself to be a young woman with long blonde hair, everyone was focused on the sight before them._

_A dark shape formed on his chest, the shape of a bat, and when that happened, everyone knew who the true king of Gotham was. Sir Conalot, with a grin of relief, was the first to bow with his wife by his side. Sir Pennyworth stepped forward and swore his allegiance to his adopted son before bowing. One by one, the people of Gotham genuflected to their new leader. One that would rule the night and be justice personified. He would become the stuff of legends. He shall be forever known as the new…_

BATMAN

Taking a deep breath as he woke up, young Dick Grayson rubbed his thumb and index finger on his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. Blood rushed out of his head as he assumed a sitting position and looked around to see Wally, Artemis, M'gann, and Conner sleeping soundly.

"Cool, dream."

He stood and silently made his way to the spare rooms as a cackle emanated behind him.


	4. Arty Hood

Arty Hood

It was a day like any other day. The sun was bright, the sky was clear; flowers in the meadow bloomed brightly, and the townspeople carried on with their day to day activities. Children played games and ran through the dirt roads to the center of Happy Harbor, eager to hear a minstrel named Ollie play his lute and entertain them with their favorite tale.

"Alright kids, who's ready for a story?" Ollie asked as he tuned his instrument. His blond, pointed beard made him seem older than he was but it was something of a trademark of his. That and the green hooded tunic and trousers we always wore.

As one, the kids shouted their agreement and couldn't wait for the story to start.

"Alright, kiddos. I have a very good one today. It's a true story that happened several years ago about a young woman and her friends who defeated the then 'Phony King of Happy Harbor, Prince Sporty. Now listen to my tale and enjoy my song."

_Arty Hood and Little Con walkin' through the forest,_

_Laughin' back and forth at what the other had to say._

_Reminiscin' this 'n' that and havin' such a good time,_

_Oo-de-lally, oo-de-lally Golly, what a day._

_Never ever thinkin' there was danger in the water,_

_They were drinkin' They just guzzled it all down._

_Never dreamin' that a schemin' sheriff and her posse,_

_Was a-watchin' them and gatherin' around._

_Arty Hood and Little Con runnin' through the forest,_

_Jumpin' fences, dodgin' trees and tryin' to get away._

_Contemplatin' nothin' but escapin' and finally makin' it,_

_Oo-de-lally, oo-de-lally Golly, what a day._

_Oo-de-lally, oo-de-lally Golly, what a day._

After taking refuge in a tree, the duo of Arty Hood and Little Con kept their eyes on the patrol of soldiers that were responsible for nearly capturing them during a morning bath. The group of armored men ran from the forest of Mount Sherwood in their ongoing search for the outlaws. With them finally out of sight, the two settled back and took a breather for the first time since being spotted by the group.

"You know something, Arty?" Little Con said as he straightened out his short sleeved black and red tunic and picked several grass burs from his dark blue trousers. "You're taking way too many chances."

"Chances? You must be joking." Arty responded while tying her long blonde hair in a ponytail. "That was just a bit of a lark, Little Con." She too fixed her green midriff baring tunic and made sure her trousers were pulled up properly from having to leave her morning bath in a hurry like Con.

"Yeah? Well take a look at your hat. That's not exactly a candle on a cake, you know."

Pulling her hat off, Arty was surprised to find an arrow skewering it. "Ooh, hello. This one almost had my name on it. They're getting better, you know. But they'll never be as good as me."

"Tuh, yeah. The next time the sheriff'll probably have a rope around our necks. And you can't laugh while hangin'."

"Ppfftt, the sheriff and his whole posse couldn't catch me or tie you up. You'd beat 'em up before they could get the nose tied. En garde!" A mischievous grin spread on her face as she used the arrow to playfully poke Con in the stomach.

"Hey, watch it, Arty. That's the only tunic I've got."

"Oh, come on. You always lose your tunic in a fight and I always steal you a new one.

"Speaking of which, are we good guys or bad guys since we rob from the rich to feed the poor?"

"Rob? That's a dirty, awful word. We never rob, Con. We just... sort of…borrow a bit from those who can afford it is all."

Looking at his partner in crime, Con shook his head and ran a hand through his messy black hair. "Boy, we are in so much debt."

As they climbed down from the tree, after making sure the coast was clear, a loud chorus of trumpets sounded off from the bottom of the mountain.

"Why, won't you look at that," Arty said as she and Little Con ducked behind a fallen log. "A royal coach. It's Prince Sporty himself."

"The prince?" Little Con asked. "I know what you're thinking, Arty, and it ain't good. I'm in."

"I always love to perform before royalty. Now, here's the plan."

After donning makeshift disguises, Arty Hood and Little Con took their positions near a steep hill that led into town. It provided just enough cover for them to work without being caught by any guards that may be in town. When the royal carriage drew near, they stepped out and brought the royal horse driver to a stop.

"Oo-de-lally! Oo-de-lally!" both bandits said as they waived to the royal trumpeter and carriage driver.

"Fortune-tellers!" Arty announced as she played into her role of an old lady.

"Fortunes forecast and lucky charms!" Little Con added as he too played his part of a broad shouldered linebacker of a woman. "And I'm not talking about the cereal."

"Why are you stopping the carriage? We must get to the…Fortune-tellers? Oh, I love fortune tellers." Peeping out of a side door, a tall, muscular man laid eyes on the two "women" and grew excited at the opportunity.

Sir Vertigo, his loyal assistant, looked at the duo suspiciously. "Sire, we shouldn't stop. They may be bandits."

"Oh, poppycock. Female bandits? What next? Little green men running around town without us knowing about them? Rubbish. Pish posh." Pushing Sir Vertigo back into the carriage, Prince Sporty turned back to address the two gypsies. "My dear ladies, you have my permission to kiss the royal hands."

As Arty and Con bowed to the prince, they began to put their plan into motion. Arty masterfully removed every jewel from the king's rings with her teeth as Con went around and knocked the driver and trumpeters out quietly. He was almost caught by the suspicious Sir Vertigo who tried to alert the prince but was immediately slapped unconscious.

"Masterfully done, Your Excellency." Arty said once Sir Vertigo hit the floor. "Now, close your eyes and let me tell your future with my mystical crystal ball."

Outside the carriage, Little Con gathered up everything Arty was secretly handing him. Several bags of gold coins were being stuffed into specially made pockets in his blouse and dress, making his appearance to look more voluptuous than he cared for. But since it was for a good cause, he didn't mind…too much. With the coin bags safely tucked away, he took one last look around and spotted another golden shine.

"You've got to be kidding me. Solid-gold hubcaps? Oo-de-lally. The jackpot." He immediately went to work on removing them. It took some time to remove them all but once he did, he signaled his friend to make her way out of the carriage.

"Now keep your eyes closed and count to ten. Do this and all your dreams will come true." Arty then slowly made her way out of the small confines as the prince counted.

"One, two, three, five, seven, nine, ten." Oh how I want my dreams to come…Hey! What are you…GUARDS!"

"Great, I run into the only prince who can't count." Arty said as she face-palmed and leapt from the carriage.

"Robbed! I've been robbed! Vertigo, wake up! I need you! I've been…whoa!"

As Prince Sporty tried to chase after the fortune bandits, he tripped on the step leading up to the carriage's door and fell face first in the mud and began to cry. It was then that he saw all the wheels had been taken off and now the carriage was supported by wooden blocks.

"Oo-de-lally, oo-de-lally!" Arty yelled as they disappeared back into the woods.

"Um, what she said." Conner said as he tried his best to carry everything in his oversized blouse and dress.

"No, no, no, no! PAULA!" He then began to suck on his thumb but instantly spit it out. "Awww, I have a dirty thumb."

"Now kids," Ollie said to his young audience, "after that, Prince Sporty posted wanted signs all around the kingdom. And even though he offered a huge reward for the capture of Arty Hood, that elusive rogue kept right on robbin' the rich to feed the poor. And it was a good thing she did, 'cause with taxes climbing ever higher, all the poor folks of Happy Harbor were starvin' to death, and I have an example of how bad it was…

Later that same day in the town of Happy Harbor, a dark skinned young man in a red and blue robe made his way through the mud to a local blacksmith's shop. He kept his eyes peeled for anyone, should they be keeping tabs on him, in case he needed to come up with an excuse as to why he's away from his church at the base of Mount Sherwood and not praying.

"Well, good morning, Friar Kal," the blacksmith said when the kindly holy man entered his shop. He slowly made his way over to the friar due to a broken leg.

"Greetings my friend. I am afraid I cannot stay for long as I am needed back at the church, but I do have something to ease your burdens." Kal, the Friar, reached into his robes and produced a small bag of gold coins. "Now, keep this hidden. It's for you from Arty Hood."

"Oh, God bless Arty Hood. She does so much good. I only wish I could thank her in-"

Before he could finish, the sound of light singing caught his and the friar's ears.

_Every town_

_Has its taxes too_

_And the taxes is due_

_Do do-do do do_

"It's the Sheriff of Cheshire!" Friar Kal forcefully whispered to the blacksmith. "Hurry, hide it! Quick!"

Barging in through the door, a dark haired woman wearing a short green tunic with long sleeves and matching trousers entered the small shop. A white battle mask was situated on her head with a pair of three pronged daggers hanging from her leather belt. "Well, greetings from your ever loving, neighborhood tax collector."

"Hello Sheriff," the blacksmith greeted. "I apologize for not being able to pay this month but as you can see I haven't been able to get much work done with my leg broken."

"I know, Otto, but you're way behind with your taxes and everyone has to pay to keep the kingdom running."

"Can't you see he's laid up, sheriff?" the friar pleaded. "He can't make money if he is not healthy. Come on, Otto, I'll help you sit down and rest."

"Why, thank you, friar." As Otto was helped to a seat by his friend, a slight jingle emanated from his cast that neither he nor Friar Kal heard, but it was just loud enough for the trained ears of the Sheriff of Cheshire.

"Here, let me give you a hand with that leg." As the sheriff tilted Otto's leg up, the small bag of coins tumbled out of his cast and into her greedy hands. Ahh, bingo! This feels like it may just cover this month's and last. Now you just need to come up with the third month's taxes, and of course the penalties, and you'll be all caught up."

The sight of this got Friar Kal all up in a tizzy and he couldn't hold his tongue. "Now see here, you, you evil, black hearted sea slug!"

"Now, now, now, now, save your sermon, preacher." The Sheriff told him. "It ain't Sunday, you know." And with that, she left.

"Now, you should get the idea of how the people were treated by the way the sheriff treated Otto, kids." Ollie took a swig of water before continuing. "As for Arty and Con, they were just finishing up making their rounds around the town. Now, rumor has it that the reason they always split up, was because Little Con would go off to see a certain lady in waiting. Arty on the other hand would strive to help the people but every once in a while she would venture to the castle where she would catch her partner and his secret girlfriend in the bushes. Now he was not the only one with eyes for someone special as Arty had feelings for a certain young prince herself…"

In the castle's backyard, laughter could be heard as a young woman and young man were engaged in a friendly game of badminton. Both were having a joyous time on this carefree afternoon and were even joined by one of the young servants who was playing a game of darts across from them.

"It's your turn to serve, Prince Wal-Man." A young freckled woman smiled brightly as she waited for her opponent to begin a new set of their game. Her auburn hair blew lightly in the soft breeze and was complemented by her white and red dress with blue accents along the bottom.

"You sure you're ready, Lady Morse?" A young redheaded man, wearing only the finest red and yellow clothing a prince could wear, tossed the shuttlecock in his hand and prepared to launch it over the net.

"Oh, as the lady-in-waiting, I'm doing my duty, waiting."

"That's not what I hear," the nearby servant said as he threw a dart and hit the bull's-eye. "I hear you've got a secret boyfriend, Lady M."

"What?" Lady Morse said with a blush. "I…I don't know what you're talking about, Robbie."

"Sure you don't," he said with a cackle. "Word has it he's an outlaw like Ar-"

"BAM!" Prince Wal-man yelled as he used the distraction to sneak an easy point on Lady Morse. She succeeded in hitting it straight up in the air then lost track of it in the sun.

"Where is it? Did you lose it?" the prince asked.

"It has to be around here someplace," Lady Morse said as she looked around.

"Oh, Lady M, you're so silly" Robbie cackled. "It's stuck to the frills on your dress."

"Oh, hello Lady Morse." As Lady Morse grabbed the bottom of her dress, she heard a faint 'psst' come from further behind her. One look in its direction made her beam a smile that she hoped the others didn't see.

"Um, Prince Wal-Man, I uh, I gotta…see I have to…"

"Oh just go already," Prince Wal-Man said with a dismissive wave.

With a squeal, she ran over to where the sound came from and disappeared into the thick foliage of the nearby forest.

"You knew about it?" Robbie asked the prince.

"Are you kidding me? He's all she ever talks about in her diary."

"You read her diary?"

"Only when she's in the woods with Little Con. She'll be gone for about an hour or two."

"Well, I have to confess something." Turning to his friend, Robbie gave a sheepish smile. "I read your diary too."

"What? You read my…I, (cough) I mean…I don't have a diary. You must be mistaken."

Letting out another cackle, Robbie continued. "So you don't have a thing for the notorious Arty Hood?"

"N…no."

"So you weren't sweet with each other as kids?"

Prince Wal-Man blushed at his friend's question. "That, that was a long time ago. I haven't seen her in so long; I forgot what she looks like."

"Yeah, I can see that. She must have been something with that brown hair of hers."

"She has blonde hair."

"AH HA! Got ya!" Robbie teased.

"Agh, I hate it when you do that, you little troll."

"Now, as night fell across the town," Ollie said to his young crowd, "Prince Wal-Man couldn't stop thinking of Arty Hood. They indeed had been friends as children but went their separate ways as they grew older. Little did he know, the blonde archer was thinking about him as she and her partner, sat down for dinner."

"Why didn't he just tell her he liked her?" a little girl asked.

"Well, see, he's just dumb like that. Now, as they ate dinner, which was burned since she and Little Con couldn't cook, they got word from Friar Kal about an archery contest in which Prince Wal-Man would be attending. And of course, they just had to attend."

"Hear ye, hear ye!" announced Prince Sporty's Captain of The Guards. "The tournament of the golden arrow will now begin!"

"Your plan to capture Arty Hood in public is sheer genius, my king." Sir Vertigo told Prince Sporty. "It surely won't fail."

"Yes, no doubt that criminal and her partner will be here. She could never pass up an opportunity to show off her skills, and when she does…I strike!" Prince Sporty slammed his fist down on Sir Vertigo's head for emphasis, knocking him out yet again, but by accident this time.

Further down the royal stands sat Prince Wal-Man and Lady Morse. "Oh, Morsey, I'm so excited. I can't wait for this to start. I wonder if Arty will be here."

"She'll be here," Lady Morse told him. "That young rogue of yours is full of surprises."

"Yeah, you're right. What chick could pass this up?" He flexed what muscles he had, embarrassing Lady Morse as he did so since he really didn't have any.

Over by the edge of the forest, Arty Hood, wearing a disguise to make her look like a homeless scoundrel, and Little Con, dressed as a royal messenger, waited for their chance to make their way over to the shooting range.

"There he is, Little Con. Just waiting for me to win this thing and award me the grand prize. And I'm tempted to take him along with the golden arrow," Arty said as she made sure her fake beard was on straight.

"Cool it, Cupid," Con told her. "Your heart's running away with your head and you've got to full Miss Bushel Britches over there."

"Don't worry, big guy. I've got everything under control. This will be my finest performance."

As the tournament got under way, a total of ten of Happy Harbor's top archers, including the Sheriff of Cheshire, took their positions. One by one, they fired their different colored arrows at a target some fifty yards away. As they attempted to hit the bull's-eye, a messenger strolled up to Prince Wal-Man and presented him with a note. He then gave Lady Morse a wink, making her blush and smile before walking off.

After several attempts, only two archers were left, a scoundrel and the sheriff herself. Even the red clad archer, the favorite from the City of the Stars, lost to the bearded scoundrel. Taking aim, the scoundrel released his bowstring and launched a green arrow at the target. It impaled itself just shy of the bull's-eye and the crowd cheered her shot. Prince Sporty spotted Prince Wal-Man clapping and staring at the scoundrel. He signaled the sheriff who nodded back at him.

"That's called puling it back and letting it go," the disguised Arty said proudly with a deep voice as the Sheriff took her turn. "I'm gonna win that golden arrow, and then I'm gonna present myself to Prince Wal-Man and-"

"Yes, well, if you shoot half as good as you blabbermouth, you'll be able to beat this shot here." Nocking an arrow in place, the sheriff pulled back and fired her shot downfield to strike the bull's-eye. "Last shot and I hit the target dead center. Top that if you can."

"Well, if you insist." With one swift motion, the scoundrel loaded and fired his shot, which split the sheriff's arrow in two. The entire crowd cheered loudly at the feat before them.

"My royal congratulations to you," Prince Sporty said as the scoundrel stood before him to collect his prize. "Now to get what's coming to you. GUARDS!"

In a flash, a group of royal guards surrounded the scoundrel as the sheriff ripped his beard off, exposing the face of Arty Hood.

"Prepare her for the axe immediately!"

"No! Wait! You can't! Please, sire, spare her life. Please have mercy," Prince Wally begged.

"Why should I?" asked Prince Sporty.

"Well, um, because… well…you see…I…kinda…"

"The twit loves her," shouted the servant, Robbie.

"Hey!" Prince Wal-Man yelled.

"So you do love her. Or are you admitting you're a twit?"

"Um…I…uhhhh…pass?"

"You love her? Does this prisoner return your feelings?" asked Prince Sporty.

"Um…well…I, uh…you see I…uhhh…" Arty froze as she and Wal-Man locked eyes.

"Enough of this!" the messenger yelled. "He loves her, she loves him, he's a twit, just shut up and let's get the heck out of here!"

With a strong kick, the messenger broke one of the support beams for the royal stands and sent the roof tumbling down onto the group of guards surrounding Arty and sent the entire crowd into chaos.

"Long live Queen Canary!" Arty shouted as she ran to grab Prince Wal-Man from the stands, as well as the golden arrow, and took off for the forest. "Down with Prince Sporty, the phony king of Happy Harbor! Long live Queen Canary!"

"Long live Queen Canary!" the crowd cheered as well.

"Enough! I am the king! King! King!" Prince Sporty yelled at the top of his lungs.

"Come on, we're getting out of here!" Little Con leapt onto the uncovered stands and flung Lady Morse over his shoulder. He then chased down Arty, Prince Wal-Man, and several others as they fought their way to the forest amongst the chaos.

"Yee-hee! Love conquers all, you losers!" Lady Morse shouted as she bounced along on Little Con's shoulders and disappeared into the woods.

Later that evening, after the sun had set, Arty and Prince Wal-man walked along the bank of a river to a large lake on Mount Sherwood. The air was still and the sounds of bullfrogs echoed around them. Countless fireflies circled the top of the water as dragonflies teased the fish by taking off just before they were made into a meal.

"Is everything okay?" Prince Wal-Man asked.

"Hm? Oh, yeah. Everything's dandy." Looking out over the lake, Arty became distant as she succumbed to her thoughts.

"Okay, if you're not going to say anything, I guess I will." Coming to a stop, Wal-Man took Arty's hands in his and looked into her eyes. "I want you to stop all this. I don't want you to be an outlaw and always on the run."

"Wal, I can't do that."

"Why not? Sporty will not stop until you're hanging from the highest tree in the kingdom or until they clean your blood off the executioner's axe."

"Wal, I can't stop right now. The people need me. They need a hero to fight for them and Little Con and I are the only ones who will stand up to him."

"Little Con, why do you call him that?"

"Cause he's anything but. I know, I can testify to that. I can also testify that after Sporty is out of Queen Canary's throne, I'll quit. Just not a moment before."

"Arty, you're gonna get killed. I can pardon you but only if you stop this stupid game."

"Stupid game?" Arty raised her voice loud enough to frighten the nearby forest animals and pushed him back. "You think this is a stupid game? This is my life! I have to steal just to eat and put clothes on my body. I have to steal to provide others a chance at any form of future besides starving to death. I don't have the luxury of sitting around all day and having servants feed me Whizzing Chicken all day."

"I do more than that, Arty." Prince Wal-Man made no effort trying to hide the anger in his voice that matched hers. "I try to help the people when I can but with Prince Sporty looking over my shoulder, I have to be a little more careful than you."

"Scraps of food and worn out clothing don't count."

"It does when said scraps are a meal for others instead of hog feed."

"Now I know why I stopped liking you," Arty snorted, "it's because you're such a blind coward."

"Blind coward? I am not a blind coward!"

"Are too."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Are not!"

"Are too, you-"

Her words were cut off as Prince Wally kissed her and didn't let up for nearly a minute.

"What…what was that for?" she asked dumbfounded once he broke the kiss.

"I should have done that a long time ago," he said with a grin.

"We both should've." She eagerly returned his affections as the fireflies continued to float around them.

"Arty! Arty!" Running out of the woods to where she and the prince were, Little Con and Lady Morse were out of breath as they came to a stop before them.

"What's wrong, Con?"

"The sheriff, she captured Friar Kal and several others after we left the shootout. She plans to hang them at dawn unless you turn yourself in."

"And Robbie?" Wal-Man asked.

"Him too." Lady Morse informed him.

"I have to go." Arty told Wal-Man. "Con, get the weapons. We leave in ten. You two, head for the cave hideout with the others and wait for us until we come back."

Wal-Man grabbed her by the arm and stopped her. "No, Arty. I don't want you to risk your life for-"

"Wallard, This is my job. I'm going to free our friends and put a stop to Sporty once and for all." She kissed him once more as Con did the same to Lady Morse before they ran off into the night.

"Well, that's how things were going for ol' Arty Hood. You see kids, there's an old saying, 'When the time comes, a hero will rise" and Arty was a hero." Ollie strummed his lute a few times then took another drink of water.

"So what happened next?" a little boy asked.

"What happened next is only known to a few people. Luckily for you, I'm one of those people. Now, Friar Kal, Robbie the servant, and a host of other people who were against the dastardly Prince Sporty, sat in the castle's prison just waiting for when a rope would be tied around their necks. However, Arty Hood had a plan up her sleeve…

"Be careful, Arty," Little Con said as he watched his partner scale the outside wall of the castle.

"No worries, Con. This will be as easy as a jailbreak." After reaching the top of the wall, Arty drew her trusty bow and pulled out an arrow from her quiver.

"Easy as a jailbreak she says. My jailbreak almost got us killed. Can't imagine how this one will go."

It didn't take long for Arty Hood to reach the gate control and knock the guard out with an arrow designed to deliver an overwhelming stench of a skunk. Another arrow knocked the lever forward and caused the gate to rise. With their escape route open and Little Con making his way in, she ventured over to the main prison gate, knocking out several more guards with fist mounted arrows. Another skunk-gas arrow knocked the sheriff out who was making sure nothing would get past her.

"Okay, Con, You free our friends while I liberate some funds from Prince Sporty pants."

"Okay." Before he began to work on the lock, he turned back to Arty and gave her a hug. "Be careful. I don't want to lose any more friends."

"You too Con. Just remember to keep swinging and always remember; they can never catch me." As Arty Hood ventured to Prince Sporty's chambers, Little Con worked on picking the lock to the prison while The Sheriff of Cheshire slept on. That is until he got angry and simply broke it with his bare hands.

"Oh, Little Con, it can't be! You've been captured as well?" Friar Kal asked as he looked up at the sound of Con's boots thudding against the stone floor.

"Quiet. We're bustin' you out of here." Grabbing the chain that bound the friar to the wall, Con easily broke it off and handed Kal his lock picks.

"Thank God. My prayers have been answered."

"Come on guys, after I snap the chains, Kal will take the shackles off."

"Hey! What's going on here?" a guard asked as he came around the corner to find Con freeing the prisoners. "I need some men over here. Jailbreak!"

While Little Con ran into trouble setting their friends free, Arty silently made her way to Prince Sporty's chamber, but not before moving a horse drawn wagon laden with hay under his window. Once she was in the phony king's bedroom, she shot an arrow down onto the wagon with a rope tied to it and tied the other end to a mounted deer's head in the prince's chambers. After her contraption was set, she began to loosely tie sacks of gold coins to the rope and slide them down to the wagon where they came untied once they landed.

All was going smoothly until she heard loud footsteps from the hall and Sir Vertigo burst into the prince's room. "Sire! Sire! Arty Hood's here breaking out the prisoners and…SIRE! ARTY HOOD'S HEREIN YOUR CHAMBERS!"

Waking up from the noise, Prince Sporty fell out of bed and immediately hid behind Sir Vertigo. "Oh! Kill her, kill her!"

"Like you ever could, I'm the hero, losers." In a single motion, Arty fired another fist-mounted arrow and knocked out Sir Vertigo. "See ya later, phony. Thanks for the tax rebate." She then leapt out of the window and used her bow to slide down the zip line she had made.

"Hurry, get to the wagon and get out of here!" Con yelled as he barreled through several guards with Friar Kal, Robbie, and the other prisoners following him. Seven guards were tossed into the air and landed with a thud on the stone floor outside from being struck with a bow staff wielded by Con..

"Con, this was a stealth mission, not a smash and grab," Arty said with a grin. "Everyone, on the wagon and grab a sack of gold for your-"

"My baby!" a woman cried out from the wagon.

Looking behind Little Con, Arty saw a young girl struggling to run with a few guards closing in on her. "Con, get out of here, I'm getting the kid!"

"But-"

"Go!"

Taking his place at the head of the wagon, Little Con grabbed the reigns and ordered the horses to go. "Rraggh, I hate hay rides."

Grabbing the young girl, Arty took off in a dead sprint as spears landed around her. With Little Con and the others past the gate, she now only had to worry about getting out with the girl, but that was easier said than done as one of the guards shut the heavy iron gate that would have led to her freedom.

"Arty!" Little Con shouted as he handed the reigns over to Fiar Kal and jumped off the wagon.

Reaching the gate, Arty handed over the child to him. "Take her. I'll get out another way. Now go!" Before Con could argue, Arty had gone.

"We got her! This time we've got her for sure!" Prince Sporty yelled as he entered the courtyard. "Shoot her! Shoot her! Shoot…where is she?"

"There!" a guard told him.

Looking to where the guard was pointing, Prince Sporty was fuming as he saw the blonde archer ascend to a tall tower by using the missed spears for leverage to climb ever higher. His anger turned to relief when he saw the sheriff seemingly pop out of nowhere and take a swipe at Arty with her triple pronged daggers. The two women engaged in a fight in which Arty managed to disarm the Sheriff of one of her blades before being knocked through a large curtain into a room.

The two women continued to fight through the castle, using everything around them as a weapon or a distraction. The sheriff, with her battle mask on, was a perfect match for Arty Hood and resorted to using a lit torch in an attempt to gain the advantage over her. She swung the fire wildly and set some of the room on fire. The flames spread quickly as they made their way from one room to another until the sheriff couldn't follow anymore.

Arty, surrounded by fire, had no choice but to look for a way out. She found one and headed for a balcony where she was met by arrow fire and the shouts of an angry Prince Sporty. Between burning to death or getting shot by arrows, she took the only option available to her. She leapt off the balcony into the water filled moat below.

"There, in the water, kill her!" the prince shouted as he, and a just woken Sir Vertigo looked on at the fleeing outlaw from the castle wall.

Arrows pierced the water around Arty Hood as she tried to swim to the shore. As she struggled to dodge the arrows and swim as fast as she could, she saw Little Con and Robbie on the shore before going down into the watery depths. The only trace of her was her hat floating to the surface with an arrow through it.

"We got her!" Prince Sporty yelled happily. "We got her, we got her, we got her!"

"Con?" Robbie said as he stood alongside the bigger man. "Con, they couldn't have gotten her. Could they?"

"I…I don't know. I…" Little Con clinched his fists tight enough to shake.

"Oh don't go cryin' on me now, big guy." Came Arty's voice from behind him.

"Arty? What the…how-"

"I told you," a grin stretched on the hatless archer's face, "they can't catch me."

"Oh, man, did you have me worried, Arty. I thought you were long gone," Con said quite relieved.

"Ah, not Arty Hood," Robbie cackled. "She could've swum twice that far. Couldn't you?"

"NOOOOOOO!" Prince Sporty yelled. "It's so miserably unfair!" He then began to suck his thumb and assumed the fetal position as Sir Vertigo grabbed a rock and knocked himself out in despair.

"A pox on the phony king of Happy Harbor!" Arty yelled as Con tried to pull her back out of the range of the archers. "Oo-de-lally! - Oo-de-lally!"

"Come on. That's enough for one day, don't you think?" He slung her over his shoulder as he and Robbie ran into the woods with her yelling 'Oo-de-lally!" the entire way.

"And so," Ollie said as he put his lute to the side. "Arty Hood saved the day and the people of Happy Harbor rejoiced their heroine's name everywhere she went. Ooh, look at the time, Queen Canary's expecting me for dinner. I've got to go."

"But what about Prince Sporty?" one of the youngest girls asked.

"Well, you see, it just so happened that Queen Canary came back the next day. And when she saw her castle burning, as well as the prince trying to take over her throne, she…well…let's just say you don't want to be anywhere around her when she screams. She put them all to work in the quarry, cutting rocks to repair the castle until their last livin' days."

"And what about Prince Wal-Man?" another girl asked.

"And Arty's friend, Little Con?" added a boy.

"Arty Hood and Prince Wal-Man married shortly after Prince Sporty and his cronies were arrested. They're living happily ever after in their castle with their children. Same thing happened with Little Con and Lady Morse. They married and are now living on Mount Sherwood with their kids as well."

Standing up, Ollie grabbed his lute and wished his young audience farewell. As he plucked at his instrument's strings, a song floated behind him as he made his way down the path.

_Oo-de-lally, Oo-de-lally Golly, what a day,_

_Oo-de-lally, Oo-de-lally Golly, what a day._

Waking up with a gasp, Artemis stared wide eyed at the TV. She let out a sigh as she saw the others still asleep around her. Rubbing her head, she reached for the lever and put the recliner back in its sitting position and sat forward with her hands between her knees as she looked at the sleeping Wally. A snot bubble expanded from his nose, causing her to make a sickened face at the sight of it.

"It'll be a cold day down below if we ever get together, lightning bolt." A grin crossed her face at the thought of them kissing in her dream. "I'll be sure to bring a sweater."

With that, she got up and made her way quietly to one of the remaining extra rooms.


	5. The Little Martian

The Little Martian

Deep under water, somewhere in the Atlantic Ocean.

"Megriel!" A small red fish with green stripes shouted as he swam as fast as he could through the water. "Megiel, wait for me!"

"Hurry up, Robder!" With a light-hearted laugh, an auburn haired mermaid with green skin swam ahead of the small fish. Even though she was very beautiful, she did not realize it and was dressed like many other mermaids her age with a pair of oyster shells covering her chest area. Her blue tail propelled her through the water expertly as she excitedly continued moving forward.

"You know I can't swim that fast, so please…ease up."

"But we're nearly, oh, there it is. Isn't it fantastic?" The two stopped a few yards from a ship that was rumored to have been sunk a few days ago. Its masts were broken, save one, and holes evident of cannon fire were blasted in its side. The large cloth sails were also torn and lying lifelessly on the sandy bottom of the ocean floor.

"Yeah, sure, it's great. Now let's get outta here and get back home."

"Not yet, I'm going inside. Just, stay out here and watch for sharks if you want if you're going to be a guppy about it." Megriel shot ahead and disappeared inside the derelict ship.

"I'm not a guppy. I love, excitement, adventure and danger lurking around every corn…sharks? Megriel, wait! I'm going in with you!"

As Robder quickly made his way inside, he could hear Megriel laugh lightly. It didn't take him long to find her scavenging around the destroyed dressers, cupboards, and shelves inside the captain's quarters. Her eyes widened in astonishment when she pulled out a silver fork.

"Oh my fins! Have you ever seen anything so wonderful in your entire life?"

"What is it?" Robder asked as he floated around her hand, examining it.

"I have no idea, but I bet Artle will know."

"Wait, what was that? Did you hear something?" Robder suddenly got very aware of what was around him and shook with fright.

"Ooh, shiney." Megriel ran her fingers along a porcelain box that contained a tiny figure of a woman in a white blouse with a red boarder around the neck and wrists. It also had a blue dress extended as if it were twirling around.

"Megriel?"

"Relax, Robder. Nothing's going to happen. Come on, let's go find Artle."

Stuffing the fork, box, and a few other finds in a bag she had found with a strap attached to it, Megriel and Robder swam out of the ship and headed for a small island where their friend Artle the seagull had her perch.

After vanishing from view, a pair of clawed hands gripped the side of the ship and pulled an attractive dark haired woman over its edge. Unlike Megriel the mermaid, this woman did not have a tail but eight tentacled legs like that of a squid. A yellow and black corset covered her torso and an evil smile crept upon her face.

"Yeeeeeees, hurry away, princess. We wouldn't want to miss old unkie's celebration, now, would we? Huh, I'll give them something to celebrate soon enough. Ridsam! I want you to keep an extra close watch on this pretty little niece of his. She may be the key to King Martian's undoing."

Several miles from the wrecked ship, Megriel emerged from the water with a splash as she flipped her head back to remove the hair from her face. Spotting her destination just to the west of her, she swam along the surface to a small island where her seagull friend lived.

"Artle!" she called, swimming up to the shore.

"Mermaid off the port bow!" a female yellow headed seagull shouted when she saw the mermaid. "How you doin', green girl?"

"Wonderful Artle." Taking the bag off, the fish tailed girl dug out the fork she found earlier. "Look what we found. I was hoping you could tell me what it is."

"Well, let's have a looksee." Taking the fork from her, Artle looked it over and even bit its pronged tip. "Yep, just as I thought. It's a dinglehopper! Humans use these to straighten out their hair. Using one of these, you can achieve an aesthetically pleasing configuration of hair that humans go nuts over. Like the beehive hairstyle or a mullet."

"Hello Megriel," the mermaid said as she lightly thumped the side of her head. "Of course it would be for the hair. That would explain the four points at the end."

"What about that one?" Robder asked when Megriel pulled out the porcelain box.

"Ah, I haven't seen one of these in years. This is wonderful! A bulbous snarfblat."

"Oohhh. What's it for?" the mermaid asked.

"Well, the snarfblat dates back to prehistoric times, when human females used to wish about what they would look like. They would sit around and stare into a box all day and imagine what they would look like if they could make themselves look any way they wished. Especially if it meant they could meet a mate at a party."

"A party? Oh my gosh, my uncle's gonna kill me. Uh, I'm sorry, I've gotta go. Thank you Artle!" The young mermaid, after packing everything back up, swam off back home with Robder trying to keep up.

"Anytime, girlfriend, anytime!" Artle yelled as she waived them goodbye.

Little did they know, a green and black eel was watching them from a distance.

Arriving at her home, the underwater kingdom of Marlantis, Megriel found herself in trouble with her uncle, King Martian who was furious at her after learning of her trip to the surface. In fact, furious was too soft of a word for what he felt. Part of the reason they thrived in the ocean was due to them living in secret, but because of his niece's tendency to venture to the surface, that ambiguity was in danger of being destroyed. She was the only mermaid to defy this rule but it wasn't out of spite to her uncle, it was simply her curiosity getting the best of her. The human world just fascinated her to no end.

Sitting alone in her cove-like room, Megriel tried her best not to cry. Her uncle was harsh but had a point. If she were to be discovered, it could potentially lead to the end of their kind. Hesitantly, Robder swam into her room. He had given her some time to gather herself but thought she could use a friend right about now.

"Megriel? Are, are you okay?" he gently asked.

"I'm fine, Robder. It's just, if only I could make him understand. I don't see how a world that makes such wonderful things, could be bad. I just wish I could be part of that world."

Breaking the fragile atmosphere of the small room, a small crab fell from on high dragging with him several of Megriel's treasures.

"Kid Crab?" Megriel said as she got out of the way of the falling knick knacks.

"What is all this?" the orange crab asked. "Are you mad? How could you…if your uncle knew about this this stuff he'd-"

"Are you gonna tell him about Megriel's collection, Crab Cake?" Robder asked as he swam up the crustacean and looked him square in the eye. "Not cool, Crab Cake. Not cool."

"Please, Kid Crab, you can't. He would never understand."

"(Sigh), You know, just once I wish you would not call me Crab Cake," the orange crab said while exhaling. "Just, come on. I'll take you to get some leftovers from the celebration then-"

Just then, a large shadow cascaded over them. The three looked up to see a large ship sailing over. A long wake followed behind it as it continued westward to its destination.

"What do you suppose is…" Swimming off, Megriel shot upward toward the ship, much to the objections of Kid Crab and Robder.

Breaking the surface carefully, Megriel poked the top of her head out of the water and was met with a sight that took her breath away. Bright colored lights seemed to explode in the sky with more joining them. She was in such a trance by the multitude of bright colors that she didn't notice Robder and Kid Crab joining her. The only thing to break her out of her trance was the sound of a loud whistle.

"I know what you're thinking tuna girl," Artle said, startling her mermaid friend. "It's called a 'vweet'. It's a form of communication among the humans."

"What does it mean?" Megriel asked.

"I don't know. But it couldn't help to take a closer look."

"Artle, why did you tell her that?" Kid Crab demanded with urgency.

"What? I was just thinking out loud."

"You were being a moron, blondie."

"Blondie? Good comeback," the seagull squawked. "Is that the best you can do pincer puss?"

"Pincer Puss?! Beak…beak…beak face."

"Oh Crab Cake, just, just stop right there and ease back into your whelmness," Robder said as he fin-palmed.

Swimming up to the ship, but being careful to not be seen, Megriel silently looked around the outer deck as she stayed in the shadow of the vessel. She could hear rambunctious laughter, music, loud talking, and the sound of an animal barking. She continued to look over as much as she could when she saw a young man, about the same age as her, lean on the hand rail.

She had never seen a human this close before nor had seen one that looked like him. His short black hair fluttered in the night breeze as with the collar of his shirt doing the same. Even his voice sounded wonderful to her when she heard him speak to a large white animal he referred to as 'Wolf'. She wanted to get closer but knew that was out of the question. He just looked so lonely.

"Hey there, sweetie. Enjoying the show?" Artle asked while paddling up to the mermaid.

"I've never seen a human this close before. He's very handsome, isn't he?" Megriel asked barely above a whisper.

"I don't know, he's too hairy and slobbery for my taste."

"Not that one, the one with the serious face and black hair." She stared longingly at him for a moment. "I like his…everything."

Looking at the one Megriel was referring to; Artle cocked her head to the side and studied him for a moment. "He needs feathers."

It was then that a powerful wind picked up.

"Ahoy! Prince Conner!" a voice yelled from further on the ship, making Megriel lower a tad bit deeper in the water. "Storm's on its way! Stand fast and secure the rigging!"

The once calm sky began to rumble with thunder as the wind kicked up violently. Artle tried her best to stay in the water but was blown away once the rain began to pour.

Looking up at the ship in hopes of seeing the man referred to as Prince Conner, the mermaid witnessed one of the masts being struck by lightning. It fell in her direction, forcing her to dive under water to avoid being struck by the massive structure. The resulting lightning strike set fire to the vessel, something she could see from under the waves, which caused those on board to leap into the water.

Watching the people swim to shore, she kept out of sight as she hid among the nearby rocks. Waves swept many of the humans away with others climbing smaller versions of the large ship. Then she saw him. Falling further into the ocean, the young man she saw leaning on the rail of the ship wasn't moving as bubbles floated out of his mouth.

Acting without thinking, Megriel came out of her hiding place and scooped him up. There were still too many humans around to bring him to the surface so she did the only thing she could think of. Holding his nose shut, she pressed her mouth over his and breathed for him. Her gills filtered the water through her neck as she breathed the oxygen into his lungs. She couldn't help but smile from the act.

After the storm subsided, she pulled Prince Conner's body out of the water and drug him to shore. By this time, Artle, who had been circling for any sign of her friend, landed nearby and looked over the man her friend rescued.

"Is he dead?" Megriel asked.

"Hmm," Artle said as she opened one of his eyes. "It's hard to say." She paced down his body and stopped at his foot where she placed an ear. "Oh my goodness! He's dead. I, I can't make out a heartbeat. He's dead! Quick, destroy his brain so he doesn't become a zombie. I've heard tales of that happening. Now, if I know my humans like I know I do, we need to flip him over and look in his posterior. That's where their brains are."

"Their posterior?"

"Yeah. From what I've heard, that's where they have their heads most of the time, and when they make you angry, you're supposed to put a boot up there."

"I don't think that's right. Oh, look, he's breathing."

Looking upon the man she saw last night, the mermaid couldn't help but move the short bangs from his face. "He's so, handsome."

She cradled him in her arms and without thinking, began to sing softly to him. She was cut short by the sound of the animal from last night named Wolf barking and the sound of a man shouting, 'Prince Conner! Prince Conner!'

She gently put him down and leapt back in the water.

Keeping an eye on the scene on the beach, she saw a dark skinned young man kneel beside Prince Conner and gently shook him awake. The large animal liked his face as he sat up. She swam a bit closer, careful not to draw attention to herself so she may hear what they were saying to each other when she overheard them speaking about her.

"Kaldur, there was a girl. (Cough) A girl res…rescued me. (Cough, cough) She was singing. She had the most beautiful voice I've ever heard but I never saw her."

She smiled brightly at his words.

"Ah, Conner, my friend, I think you've swallowed a bit too much seawater," Kaldur told him. "I will take you back to your castle and let the nurses tend to your wounds. Come on, Wolf."

"Kaldur," Conner said as he stopped and looked out over the ocean. "I have to find her."

Hiding in the rocks, the green and black eel watched the entire scene take place and scurried away. Everything he saw was relayed to the octopus woman who had commanded him to follow the little mermaid as she looked through his eyes using a large magical pearl within her underwater layer.

"Awwww, so cute. Ugh, I can't stand it. The child is in love with a human. I can see it radiating off her even without my magical pearl. And what's worse, it's not just any human but a prince! Oh how her uncle will love that. King Martian's headstrong, lovesick girl would make a charming addition to my little plan."

The next morning in the Marlantic palace, Megriel was busy picking petals off a flower while Robder played with a strange curved piece of metal and Kid Crab paced back and forth quickly.

"O.K. So far, so good," Kid Crab said, mostly to himself than anyone else. "I don't think the king knows, but it will not be easy keeping something like this a secret for long. I need you to act normal."

"He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me not," Megriel said as she plucked the petals off one by one.

"We can do this. We can keep last night a secret from King Martian and no one will ever know what you did despite my adamant protests of why you shouldn't have gone there in the first…oh will you stop that!"

"He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me not, He loves me. He, he loves me! I knew it!" Dropping the empty flower stem, she swam in a circle and giggled before heading over to her treasure room. "I've got to see him again tonight. After uncle goes to sleep, I'll swim to Artle's island and have her take me to where he lives and Robder will splash to get his attention and he'll come out to see what the noise is and I'll see him and…oh, I can't wait!"

"Can't wait for what?" boomed her uncle, the king's, voice.

"Um, Your Highest of highnesses," Kid Crab said quickly. "I, I, I, was just telling your niece about, well, see, it's really a funny story you see…I…are you using a new lotion on your skin because it's really a lot more greener and, and, shiny looking and, and your brow sticks out so much, now that it's surely a sign of your superior masculinity and that red 'X' on your chest is the absolute bomb. And your head is just so…so…clean, like you never had the need for hair. And your tail, your tail is just so…tail like, it's-"

"Kid Crab," the king said with a chuckle. "Don't strain yourself. I know all about it. I raised several kids myself you know."

"You know about last night?" Robder asked.

"Uncle I can explain," Megriel quickly interjected. "You see he was-"

"I know, I know." King Martian waived his hand reassuringly. "I went through the same thing at your age. So tell me, who's the lucky merman?"

"Merman?"

"Yes. I heard you from the hallway. It's clear as day you're in love with some lucky merman. So tell me, who is it?"

When she didn't answer, only blushed, the king turned to Kid Crab. "Come on, Kid Crab, who is it?"

"Um, well…" Rubbing his claws together, the crustacean began to stutter.

"Out with it Kid Crab."

"Well?"

"My patience is wearing thin. I want the truth and I want it-"

"I tried to stop her, sir but she wouldn't listen. I told her to stay away from the humans but-"

"WHAT ABOUT HUMANS?!" King Martian yelled.

"Uncle-" his niece pleaded.

"Is it true?" the king asked her.

"I…yes." Her voice grew very meek. "I had to. He was drowning and-"

"Contact between the human and the mer-world is strictly forbidden, Megriel, you know that! Everyone knows that!

"But he would have died if I-"

"Then he would have been one less human to worry about!"

"You don't even know him."

"Know him? I don't have to know him. They're all the same. Spineless, savage, harpooning, fish-eaters, that hoard all of the Oreos and are incapable of any-"

"Uncle, I love him!"

"What?" the king asked as his entire demeanor grew dark. "He's a human, you're a mermaid-"

"I don't care," she said with tears rolling down her face.

"I'll make you care." He reached behind him and drew his golden trident that was slung on his back. "If this is the only way," he charged it up, "then so be it."

"Uncle?" she saw him aim his weapon at the trove of treasures she had collected since she were a child. "No. No, please. Uncle, stop! Stop!"

A large burst of energy shot forth and destroyed the small cove filled with her treasures. Debris scattered around and settled to the floor where she fell and cried her heart out.

"Megriel, you need to learn that the reason we are alive is due to staying hidden. If we are to be discovered we would be hunted down and killed."

She looked up at him before putting her face in her hands once again. It was a look that broke his heart and made him realize what he had done. Not being able to bring himself to say anything, he lowered his head and left. Robder and Kid crab left as well after being told she wanted to be left alone. After a while, a black and green eel slithered around several rocks and floated up behind her.

"Poor child," the eel said. "Poor, sweet child. It seems you have a very serious conundrum."

"Who, who are you?" the crying mermaid asked.

"You may call me, Ridsam. And I have a proposition for you. A proposition that will make all your dreams come true. Including a chance at a life with your prince. If this is something you want, simply follow me."

Looking back at where her uncle and friends went, the mermaid quickly thought of everything that had happened and the way she felt living under the sea. It was a decision easily made.

A short time later, Megriel, led by Ridsam, arrived at a dark seaweed covered cave. After entering, the mermaid beheld a large conch shell emanating a strange purple light that made her think twice about going any further. Those thoughts were erased when she felt a pair of hands wrap around her shoulders.

"We mustn't lurk in doorways," a seductive female voice said, "it's extremely rude."

"Who, who are you?" Megriel asked.

"My name is Queen Beesurla, my little miss, and I hear you have a thing for a…human."

"How did-"

"Oh, I know many things." Swimming over to a large glowing pearl, Queen Beesurla waived her hands over its smooth surface and made Prince Conner appear. "My, my, he is quite a catch, isn't he? Well, my sweet, the solution to your problem is simple. The only way to get what you want…is to become a human yourself."

"Can you do that?"

"I only live to help poor souls like you gain what they truly desire."

Looking into the magical pearl, Megriel could see the prince sitting by himself in a room's corner as a large gathering of people mingled with each other. His attention was focused on the sea, making her feel as if he were looking for her at that moment. She could see him clearly now and fell in love with him all over again.

"Now, here's the deal," Beesurla began, "I will turn you into a human for three, count them, three days, as that's the limit for spells such as this, understand? Now, here's the important part, before the sun sets on the third day, you've got to get your dear blue eyed prince to fall in love with you and kiss you. But it cannot be just any kiss, no, no, no; it must be the kiss of true love. If he kisses you before the sun sets on the third day, you'll remain human and you can be with him permanently, but if he doesn't, then you'll turn back into a mermaid, and must serve me, of course, for giving you such a chance at true happiness. Do we have a deal?"

At the entrance of the cave, Kid Crab overheard everything. He tried to stop her from making the deal and to tell Megriel she's dealing with a sea witch but was ambushed from behind by Beesurla's minion, Ridsam. The last thing he saw before blacking out was Megriel pulling out a small porcelain figurine to show the tentacled woman and a bright light surround the mermaid.

"Megriel? Megriel, can you hear me?" Kid Crab asked as he and Robder tried to wake her.

It had been an hour since she swam into the cave of Queen Beesurla and was only by chance Artle had spotted her lying among the rocks of the beach. After finding Robder and Kid Crab, the trio worked on getting her further up on the sand and had draped a torn piece of a sail over her to cover her up.

"Well lookey what happened to green girl, she's lost all coloring and has tan skin now. And she's got a new posterior. Hmm, I guess she now has a place to put her head." Artle said as she paced around the sleeping girl's head.

"STOP WITH THE HEAD UP THE POSTERIOR, YOU IDIOT!" Kid Crab yelled. "She's a human! A no good stupid human! She's-"

"Crab Cake, Bird Brain, quiet. She's waking up," Robder pointed out.

With several coughs, the one-time mermaid opened her eyes and sat up quickly. She was greeted by her oceanic friends but found she could not greet them back as her voice was gone. A worried look came over her before Kid Crab calmed her down and explained about the deal she made and what she had to do. She had traded her mermaid form for a human's but also gave up her voice for three days in return. The crustacean went into a fit at what happened but as he did so, Artle tried teaching Megriel how to use her new legs. Wobbly at first, she got used to them, just in time to hear a familiar bark from around a large group of rocks. What appeared was the large white animal she saw with the prince on the ship but now it was chasing her. Robder fled back in the water while Kid Crab hid in the folds of the sail she wore. Artle took to the air, but not before giving Megriel a luck filled wish.

"Wolf, Wolf, down boy, come here!" Prince Conner, in a pair of dark blue pants and a white shirt with a red insignia, ordered his pet as he came around the rocks. He froze in his tracks when he saw the young auburn haired woman perched on a rock with a torn sail wrapped around her.

"Conner! Conner! Where are you my friend?" A dark skinned young man joined Conner and both stared at the young woman. "Who is that?"

"I don't know Kaldur. She was just…" Taking a few steps, Conner stood at the base of the rock and looked up at the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. "You…seem…very familiar. Have we met?"

She tried to say something but forgot she couldn't speak.

"My friend, if you're still searching for that mystery girl, I doubt she's her. She's a mute."

"I suppose you're right. But she's out there somewhere." He extended a hand and offered to help Megriel down. When she tried to stand on the sand, she fell forward only to be caught by him. "Easy. You must have really been through something. Don't worry, I'll help you. Come with us, you'll be okay."

It didn't take long for them to reach the sea side castle where Conner lived. She was immediately pampered by servants on his request. They filled a deep basin with warm water and a substance that smelled and felt so good. She had fun playing with the delicate bubbles as a woman supplied her with soaps and took her 'dress' to be cleaned.

Afterward, she was dressed in a green and white dress and led to a large dining hall where Prince Conner and his friend Kaldur waited to sit with her and gave her compliments on how beautiful she looked. She enjoyed the meal given to her and tried not to blush as the two men talked about the mystery girl Conner was looking for and how his other friends teased him about being in love with her. She also liked hearing how she was the only one to actually get him to smile.

"You know, Conner, perhaps our guest might enjoy seeing some of the sights of the kingdom," Kaldur said after wiping his mouth.

Conner looked up at him after he took a bite of his food. "I'm sorry, Kal, what was that?"

"You shouldn't spend all your time moping around here, you need to get out. I'm sure the young lady would like to see the grounds of the kingdom."

Megriel nodded vigorously.

"Ok, then. After dinner, I'll show you around the castle and then the town tomorrow." Again, Conner grinned.

The next day saw the prince and Megriel tour the town. They rode in a carriage, visited a place where animals from around the world were on display, ate at fine restaurants, and ventured through the wildflowers of the countryside. It was all amazing to her, everything she saw, smelled, and heard. Finally, at the closing of the day, she and Conner prepared to go out on a lake. As she waited for him to retrieve a boat, Kid Crab came out of his hiding place within a pocket of her blue dress. She was adorned in the same outfit the little figurine was when she first discovered that porcelain box.

"Good gravy, girl," Kid Crab said as he scuttled on the ground. "This has got to be, without a doubt, the single most stupidest thing you have ever done. Now pay attention. When he takes you for that ride, you gotta do everything you can get him to kiss you. You gotta bat your eyes, like this."

He disturbingly smiled and fluttered his eye lids quickly.

"You gotta pucker up your lips, like this."

He puckered his lips together in a way that made Megriel laugh. He looked absolutely ridiculous. She shook her head and gestured about how she didn't need his help in getting Conner to like her.

"Oh, okay, fine. You are a hopeless child, you know that? (Gasp) I gotta go, he's coming." As he scuttled off, he spoke to himself, "For the love of gills, please let this works."

The two rowed out into the center of the lake while engaged a one sided conversation. Within the water, Robder, Kid Crab and Artle, perched on an overhead branch, watched the two as they stared at the sunset.

"Come on, guy," Robder said as he and the others hid among the reeds. "You see her there sitting across the way."

"Even though she ain't got a lot to say, he's got to see there's something about her," Artle said.

"Oh, just come on and kiss the girl." Kid Crab said a little too loudly.

"Did you hear something?" Conner asked. Megriel just shook her head and tried to avoid looking at her friends who were silently tailing them.

Lightly elbowing Artle as she landed in the water and swim next to them, Robder whispered to her, "You can tell he wants her. Look at him, you know he does."

"Men," Artle said. "The guy's too shy, he ain't gonna kiss her. He's gonna miss the girl."

"Over my mamma's soft shell." Kid Crab said before they swam behind a batch of water grass to conceal them once the boat stopped.

"You know, I feel bad not knowing your name. I wish I could find out," Conner told her as he leaned on his knees.

"Megriel, her name is Megriel," Kid Crab whispered as he backstroked past.

"There it is again," Conner said as he sat up straight. "Are you sure you're not hearing anything?"

Megriel shook her head, her eyes becoming wide at the knowledge of what her friends were up to. She felt embarrassed at their ploys and also that she wasn't doing a good job of getting him to like her herself. Thinking fast, she remembered picking up a napkin from the restaurant they were at for lunch and a piece of charcoal she got from her room before she left and scribbled her name on it.

"Megriel?" Conner said as he read the paper. "Well, that's kinda pretty. Okay. Nice to know you, Megriel."

She flashed a bright smile as he said her name and the two leaned in close. The moonlight shone upon her face as she looked at him from under her long eyelashes.

"Dude," Kid Crab said as he watched the two. "Now's your moment, here in the blue lagoon. Do it now, do it now. She won't say a word until you kiss the girl, you blockhead."

"Eee, he's so close," Artle quietly squealed. "Don't stop now, kiss her."

Both Megriel and Prince Conner leaned in a little further.

"They're gonna do it," Robder said. "He's gonna kiss the-"

With a loud splash, the bat tipped over and the two fell into the water.

"Hang on," Conner said as he swam over to Megriel. "I gotcha'." He took her in his arms and began to swim to the shore, making sure she wasn't in any trouble of drowning.

Silently, a light wake moved out of the lake as a green and black eel left the scene of the crime.

"Nice work, my slave. That was too close. The little tramp is better than I thought. He'll be kissing her by sunset for sure. I guess it's time I took matters into my own tentacles." A bright light surrounded the sea witch as she laughed evilly from the confines of her cave.

The next morning found Megriel in the room Conner had given her for her stay. She had slept longer than normally, dreaming about last night and almost kissing Prince Conner. The night had been full of dreams like that, each one ending with them sharing love's true kiss. She happily brushed her hair, not with a fork but a brush, as she daydreamed about her making that kiss happen.

"Megriel! Megriel!" Artle shouted as she came crashing into the young girl's room. "Megriel, emergency! EMERGENCY!"

Turning to face the panicking seagull, Megriel grabbed her by the sides and shook her gently in the hopes she would regain her composure.

"What's going on?" Kid Crab asked as he scuttled in from the bathroom. "I was in the middle of a perfectly good steam facial and-"

"THE PRINCE IS MARRYING THE SEA WITCH IN DISGUISE!" Artle shouted.

"What are you talking about?" Kid Crab asked. "What do you mean he's getting married?"

"I was flying back home last night after Megriel went to bed and heard the prince tell his friend he was falling for her when I heard Megriel's voice come from the beach. The prince was…I don't know, hypnotized, or discombobulated, or twitterpated into falling in love with her. I didn't know it was her until I saw her reflection in the water. And it was Beesurla!"

Megriel held her hands over her mouth as a tear ran down her face.

"Are you sure?" the little crab asked.

"Of course I'm sure, shell for brains. Have I ever been wrong? I mean when it's important."

Getting up, Megriel ran out of the room to find out if this were true when she came across Prince Conner, a beautiful brunette woman, and Kaldur talking in the foyer of the castle. Sure enough, they were making plans to be married at the end of the day. Heartbroken, she ran the opposite way and out the rear entrance to the beach.

Hours later, Artle and Kid Crab found her sitting on a pier crying as a large royal ship began to take off. Robder tried to console her but couldn't. He was surprised when Kid Crab and Artle came up beside her.

"Megriel," the crab said. "There you are. We need to act fast."

Megriel shook her head. Unknown to them, she was refused to be seen by the prince and kicked off the ship. She was then mocked by the disguised Beesurla as the loading plank was picked up.

"Listen to me, girl," Artle told her. "It's a trick. He doesn't love her. She has him under a spell using your voice."

"Yes," Kid Crab said, taking over. "The sun hasn't set yet. You still have time to make him realize he loves you."

Megriel looked at her friends with a tear stained face.

"Do you love him?"

She nodded.

"Then here is what we do." Making his way over to several wooden barrels, Kid Crab closed his eyes and put his claws together as if her were praying. "KA-RA-TE!" He jumped in the air and kicked one of the barrels off into the water. "Now grab on to that. Robder, get her to that boat as fast as your fins can carry you! Artle, stall that wedding at all costs!"

At the beginning of sunset, a priest in a white robe waited as the bride and groom took their positions before him. "Dearly beloved…"

Reaching the ship, Artle targeted the wedding below and heard Prince Conner say 'I do' hypnotically. "(Sigh) The fun I have for my friends. CANNONBALL!"

Before the priest could finish the ceremony, Artle dive-bombed the dark haired woman's head, knocking her veil off and causing her to stumble forward. Prince Conner stood in silence as if nothing were transpiring.

"Get away from me you molty little, Oh!" As the woman fought the seagull, a seashell amulet, which was glowing, was snatched up by her airborne attacker.

As Artle flew away, she tossed the shell to the edge of the ship where the just arrived Megriel caught it. She threw it on the ground and stomped on it, breaking the spell and freeing her voice as well as Prince Conner.

A yellow light circled Megriel and lit her up, giving her, her voice back. "Conner!"

Holding his head from the spell being broken, Prince Conner looked up at the sound of her voice and recognized it from when he awoken on the beach several days ago. "Megriel?"

"Conner," she said as they ran up to each other.

"It's you. You're the one who rescued me, who sang to me and-"

With a gasp, Megriel stiffened in his arms and let out a scream. Conner panicked but didn't let her go as she sank to the deck. As the sun set on the ocean's horizon, her legs disappeared underneath her dress and were replaced by a large tail fin. Conner's eyes opened wide when he saw the scaly appendage and held her close as her skin turned back to green. "Megriel…"

"I, I wanted to tell you but, I…I"

"You're too late!" Transformed back into her true form, Queen Beesurla slithered her way over to the two and grabbed Megriel before diving overboard. "You're too late, loverboy!"

"Megriel!" Conner shouted as she disappeared beneath the waves.

"Let me go!" Megriel struggled to get out of Beesurla's grip but couldn't. "Let me go! Conner!"

"Stop right there!" Swimming up to them was King Martian. He had his trident drawn and charged up, ready to blast Beesurla at a moment's notice.

"Not a chance, Martian!" Beesurla told him. "She's mine now. We made a deal and it cannot be broken." She pulled out a contract and showed it to the king. "See? It's all legal. I made sure to have it notarized as well."

At the sight of the contract proclaiming the deal, King Martian blasted it but nothing happened.

Looking at her Uncle, Megriel managed to stammer out, "Uncle, I'm sorry! I-"

"Megriel," King Martian said. "Give her back to me or I'll-"

"I'll make you a deal, right here, right now," Beesurla said. "Her for you and everything you own. Upon agreement, I'll destroy this contract and she'll be free, unlike you. How much does your precious niece mean to you?"

King Martian looked at the young mermaid with worry. "Done."

"No!" Megriel shouted.

A yellow light circled the three of them as Beesurla let out an evil filled laugh as she began to grow.

"Oh, snap." Kid Crab said as he and Rodber were covered by a large shadow.

Robder could barely bring himself to say anything. "Switching from whelmed to overwhelmed in three, two…"

Rising up out of the sea, Beesurla laughed maniacally as she grew to enormous size. Waves crashed into the ships that flanked the large one where Prince Conner was supposed to marry the disguised sea witch, sending the sailors and guests jumping overboard.

"Uncle?" Megriel said when she saw King Martian turned into a sea sponge then turned to face the sea witch. "You monster!"

"If you were smart, you little brat, you would take your uncle and bow before the new ruler of Marlantis and the oceans of the - GAAAAHH!"

Stopping her ranting, Prince Conner and Kaldur had fired several cannons at the belly of the large sea witch.

"I'll make you pay for that." Raising the golden trident, Beesurla charged it up to deliver a blast to take out the ship the two men had commandeered. "Say goodbye to your sweetheart, mer-trollop."

"Nooo!" Grabbing a lost harpoon, Megriel charged at the witch and speared her in the side. The pain she caused her made her blast miss. "You insignificant fool!"

Raising the trident over her head, Beesurla summoned a squall forcing Megriel into a nearby exposed rock. As she clutched herself to it, Conner piloted his ship over to where she was while Kaldur ordered the soldiers to keep firing.

"Conner, what are you doing?" Kaldur shouted over the cannon fire.

"I have to save her!" Conner yelled back.

"We have to save ourselves first! Men, fire another round! Conner, I need you to bring us to port side, we need to get behind her as long as she has that trident!"

"Conner!" Megriel yelled when she saw him on the ship. "Just go!"

Looking back at the sea witch, Prince Conner got an idea. "Abandon ship! Off port, now!"

"What?" Kaldur yelled.

"Abandon ship, all is lost!"

As the men jumped overboard, Beesurla gave a loud laugh. "Some hero, little girl. He abandoned you!" She charged up her trident again and aimed it at the mermaid. "So much for true love."

Ready to deliver a death strike to Megriel, Beesurla failed to see the ship that had fired upon her change direction with only Conner on board who had stayed behind. He aimed the tip of the bowspirit of the ship directly at the giant witch and succeeded in spearing her through the gut. The force behind the ram was enough to skewer her all the way through.

With a yell of pain, Beesurla dropped the trident and trashed her tentacles around. Running to get out of the way, Conner was about to jump overboard when one of the tentacles crashed through the ship and triggered the remaining gunpowder to explode. The blast was enough to destroy the sea witch and send what was left of her body to the bottom of the sea where she dissolved into nothing. Her minion was also caught in the blast and was destroyed as well as the spell she had casted, which was now broken.

Looking around, Megriel spotted Conner's body floating in the water and swam over to him. She drug him on shore where she laid his unconscious body carefully on the sand and made sure he was breathing. She whispered his name and wiped the wet bangs from his face. After a moment, he woke to see her looking down upon him.

Back to his normal self, King Martian watched his beloved niece and the human she had fallen for.

"She really does love him, doesn't she, Kid Crab?"

"I suppose she does," Kid Crab said. "Like I always say, Your Majesty, children must be free to lead their own lives."

"Since when?"

"Since about two seconds ago."

Letting out a sigh, King Martian pointed his trident at Megriel. "Do you know the hardest part about this?"

"What's that, Your Majesty?"

"I'm going to miss her, so, so much."

"I have to go," Megriel told Conner as they sat on the beach.

"I don't want you to," he told her.

"I can't stay here. My uncle was right. This is not a world meant for me."

"But I-"

"I'm sorry." She kissed him and forced herself to let him go. Turning away with tears rolling down her face, Megriel went back into the ocean but stopped when she saw her uncle pointing his trident at her. A bright blast struck her and once again, her tail disappeared and was replaced by a set of legs.

"Megriel?" Conner said as he rushed to catch her as she fell to the ground.

Looking at her legs, Megriel smiled brighter than she had ever smiled before. The tattered dress she wore was replaced with a glittering silver one. They didn't say a word, instead, they shared love's true kiss.

It wasn't long until they were married.

Slowly waking up, M'gann stretched and looked up at Conner who was still asleep. A wide smile stretched across her face as she kissed him on the cheek and wrapped him in her arms before placing her head on his chest.

"I love happy endings."

She then drifted back to sleep.


	6. Concules

Concules

Years ago in the city of Happy Harbor, on a bright, sunny day, townsfolk busied themselves by shopping in the local farmer's market. Men checked out various tools for sale while women fretted over dresses made of the finest materials available. Animals wondered around enclosed pens, just waiting for interested buyers to take them home.

Down the road of the farmer's market, a trail of dust shot into the air as it traveled ever closer to the thriving center. To someone not familiar with the weekly sight, it would be cause for curiosity. Those who knew what it was; however, knew it was absolutely cause for panic. Maybe it was the many deals, or how beautiful the day was, but no one seemed to have been paying attention to the oncoming dust trail.

"Concules, slow down!" a dark skinned young man with tattoos of sea serpents covering his arms yelled as he held on for dear life to the edges of a wooden wagon. What used to be jet black hair on his head was a shade of yellow, something he blamed his friend for by the way he behaved and the frights he would give him when he did things like this.

"Sorry, Kalryon, but you told me not to stop for anything or slow down." Heading for the central market at his top speed, a broad-shouldered teenager picked up even more speed than he was already running at to do as his friend had asked of him. His white toga was stained with mud at the bottom.

Barreling head first down the dirt road, Concules ignored other, slower, cart drivers and was constantly being yelled at to slow down or watch where he was going. Gentle turns were skipped as he simply continued on a straight path with a large stone archway marking the market grew closer every second. It wasn't until he was in the center of the flea market type shops when he finally came to a stop. The sudden application of resistance to his forward momentum caused his body to be buried up to his neck in the rocky dirt.

Patting himself over, Kalryon counted his blessings he was still on one piece. "Th…thank you, my friend. For both the invigorating ride into town and the…the early morning wake up call. My hair may be a shade lighter now."

"No problem. I just hope the bridge over that gorge is repaired by next week. Jumping over it is easier without a cart full of hay bales."

"Yes, well, maybe on the way back we can take the detour instead of the…airborne route you suggested. Now if you'll excuse me, I must find Garthideas and haggle my price for the hay with him as well as visit the facilities…and buy a new toga."

"I'll be here by the cart, as usual."

As his friend walked off to tend to his business, Concules ran a hand through his short, black hair and rubbed the back of his neck. People walking by paid him no attention except for walking away or turning their heads up at him. His bright blue eyes loathsomely scanned each and every one of them, sizing them up in case any should try something stupid like antagonize him into a fight as he leaned against the cart with his arms crossed. None ever did try anything funny as they all must have learned from the time Pretzeldo dared to make fun of him for his lack of emotions. The shape Concules twisted him into is said to have been the inspiration for a salted bread.

As he stood by the cart, a group of boys his own age ran by while playing a game of discus. The clay toy landed at his feet where he simply stared at it and gave a snort.

"Concules…it's…it's you," one of them said as he ran up to the youth.

"You, uh…you guys need another player?" he asked as he picked up the disc and handed it back to them.

"Nnno, no. That's okay," the boy told him. We already have three and an odd number would be weird to play with."

"Wait a second," Concules said, raising an eyebrow. "Three is an odd number. It's also the second smallest prime number and is the first lucky prime-"

"What are you? A walking encyclscroll?" another boy said as he snatched the disc from him and ran off with the group.

"What a geek!" the third boy said.

"Destructo boy," added another.

"Maybe we should call him 'Jerkules'," the first one said.

As the three ran away mocking him, Concules stared at them with a sneer. He didn't know why he was like that sometimes, it was just the way he was brought up at the orphanage he lived at. Because of his attitude, he was always alone, except for Kalryon who was the only one to befriend him.

"A little help! Please, a little help!"

Switching his gaze from the teenagers to where the shouting came from, the dark haired teen saw a large clay pot being carried by a plump older man. Rushing up to his shop, Concules grabbed the pot and took it from the man quite easily.

"Don't worry, I got it." Taking it from the plump man, the teen turned to the front of the shop where several other large pots were.

"Oh thank you. I…uhhh…Concules?" The man's eyes widened at the sight at who was helping him. "Uhhh nevermind, I got it, I-"

"Are you sure? It doesn't look as if you can carry it."

"No, no, I just didn't have a good enough grip on it."

Over by the cart Concules was at, the three teenage boys who were playing discus kept their eyes on him.

"Hey," the first boy from earlier said. "Wanna see something funny?"

At the snickering of his friends, the boy tossed the discus over to the shop Concules and the man were in. As the teen went to hand the man the large pot, he stepped on the disc and slipped backwards into a support pillar. Fortunatly, the pot he carried didn't fall and break. Unfortuantly, the pillar he fell into was the main supported for all the shops around them.

One by one, they fell in order from the first one he hit and down the line. People ran for their lives as animals panicked alongside them. Purchases were dropped, money spilt out of hands, and cries rose to the heavens as the pillars continued to fall. It wasn't until some minutes later when the last one fell and the dust settled.

"Concules?" Kalryon said as he walked up to his friend while overlooking the destroyed area. "Concules, what happened?"

"Uh, the monkey did it." Concules said as he stood rather stiffly amongst the rubble.

"My shop!" the plump man yelled. "My wares! My…my…"

"Um, this one…didn't break." Concules pointed to the pot he was carrying, the only pot that wasn't lying in pieces that is.

"Freak!" someone yelled.

"Menace!" another said.

"Bombastic muscle-headed simpleton!" shouted another.

"Get out!" the man yelled. "Get out of here and never come back! You…you…degenerate, hooliganistic, son of a senseless, no good…thing! GET OUT!"

"I…" Concules tried to say.

"My friend, I think it is best we just leave." Kalryon told him.

Later, back at the orphanage Concules and Kalryon lived at, the dark headed youth sat on a hill overlooking the countryside as the sun set. He had been doing this since they had arrived back home with Kalryon giving a portion of his money from selling the hay to the headmaster to support the place for a while longer.

"My friend, you shouldn't let those things they said back there get to you," Kalryon said as he joined the brooding teen.

"But they're right. I am a freak," Concules said with a sigh. "Sometimes I feel like I really don't belong here. Like I'm supposed to be someplace else."

"Concules, there's, there's something I think you ought to see."

In a large wooden shed behind the orphanage, Kalryon moved a large panel from the floor and took out a white tubular basket with a small object wrapped in it.

"While cleaning out this place a few months ago for extra scrap metal, I came across this hidden compartment. I think the original woman who found you must've had a good reason for not showing you this before she died last month."

"Why would she not show this to me? She showed you the basket you were left in. Why was I different?"

"Because, she said this was around your neck when she found you." Unwrapping the small object, Kalryon showed his friend a red metal shield with an 'S' in its middle. "Do you know what this is? It's the symbol of the leader of the Superheroes, Supes."

Taking the red object, Concules looked it over carefully then looked back at Kalryon. "This is it. Maybe this is what I've been looking for. I'll go to the temple of Supes and get my answers there. Kal, thank you."

"You're welcome, my friend. Good journey."

Arriving at the temple of Justice well after nightfall, Concules brashly stalked his way up to the large statue of the leader of the Superheroes. It was a massive structure standing in the center of several other equally large statues of several other supers including the Superhero of Speed, Superhero of The Night, Superheroine of Women, and so forth.

"Okay, so, I normally don't do this because you've never done anything for me but…I kinda need some answers like, 'Who am I? Where do I belong?'"

He waited patiently but nothing happened.

"Knew this was a waste of my time."

As he turned to leave, the wind began to blow hard, forcing him to put his hands up to block his face. A loud bang and flash struck the temple and a rumbling filled the area as the statue of Supes came to life.

"My boy. My little Concules," the representation of the king of the Supers said. He took a step forward off the large pedestal he stood on as Concules looked up at the living statue with wide eyes. A yell flooded out of his mouth as he turned to run out of the temple but was picked up by one of the statue's large hands. "Hey, hey, hey, hold on kiddo. A superhero doesn't run at the sight of a challenge. They stay and fight."

"I'm not running," Concules said as he used his great strength to force the statue's hand open. "I'm moving from a confined space to a more open one so I can kick your…a, a superhero?"

"Why yes. You my boy are an honest to goodness superhero, taking after your surrogate mother and myself. How else do you think you're so superhumanly strong?"

"Wait, so you're…you're my…my…father?"

"Well, kinda. You were made from part of Diera, Wonder Heroine of all Women and I. The two most powerful supers created the next generation to bring justice to…to…the unjustified."

"So are or aren't you my father?" Concules asked with his hands crossed over his chest.

"Well, see, that's a…"

"Nevermind. But, why did you give me away like that? Didn't you want me?"

"Concules," Supes sighed. "Of course we did. You're a part of us. You were going to help us keep the evildoers at bay but someone stole you from us when you were an infant and turned you partially mortal. That is why you cannot fly like Diera or I. Hey, that sort of rhymed."

"Ugh" The teen rubbed his hand over his face. "Then what do I need to do to become a full superhero?"

"Concules, if you want to become a superhero and live up on Mount Watch where you can monitor the Earth, you need to prove yourself a true hero to the people. Then, and only then, will your true herohood be restored."

"Okay, so, save a few damsels, beat up some criminals, and become a superhero. Got it." Leaping down from the stone hand, Concules started for the door. "I'll be done in no time."

"So stubborn. You must get that from Diera. If you are to be a true hero you must get proper training first. Seek out Robitetes, the trainer of heroes."

"I can do this by myse-" Before the hardheaded teen could finish, two red beams of energy struck the floor where he was heading. Black smoke rose from the foot deep craters that he stared at with a shocked expression. "So, I'll give this Robitetes a visit. No problem."

"And you'll need this," Supes added.

With a loud whistle, he summoned a large white wolf with wings coming out of its sides. "You probably don't remember Wolfasus but you two go way back. He was a gift to you when you were born."

The white wolf sniffed the teen then licked his face. Instantly, a long forgotten memory flashed before Concules' eyes and he remembered the animal doing the same thing so many years ago.

"Oh, Wolfasus!" Climbing on his pet's back, the youth held on to the thick fur as they went airborne.

"He's a magnificent animal with the brain of a bird," Supes told him. "Now go and become a true…huh?"

Looking around, Supes saw the teenager had already left. "Kids. They grow up so fast."

The next day, Concules arrived at a large island with a bird shaped mountain at its southern end. Tall trees lined an overgrown grassy area with a lake bordering one side of the mountain where the two landed and began their search. It didn't take long to find someone or something as the case may be. Sticking out of a bush, a pair of bird legs bounced up and down as a cackle emanated from the hidden portion within it. Looking at where the head was looking, if it had one that is, the teen saw a trio of young women wearing yellow and blue skirts.

"He's a peeping tom. Whatever he is."

Grabbing the birds exposed end, Concules pulled it back and was taken by surprise when he saw the upper torso of a young boy.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing? Let me go!"

Doing as he said, Concules dropped the bird-boy on his head. He landed with a thud on the ground and quickly looked at where the three females were.

"Aww, they're gone. You know how many girls I get to come to my island? Not that many, big boy." The black haired bird-boy dusted himself off, taking care to not ruffle his crimson feathers more than what they were when he saw the taller boy looking at him strangely. "What? You've never seen a bird satyr before?"

"No, and I'm not looking for one now. I'm searching for a Robitetes and I-"

"You're looking at him, but ex-nay on the Robitetes and call me Rob."

"You're Robite…Rob? The trainer of heroes? But…you're so…small."

"First of all, I don't train heroes anymore. But if I were, I'd give you some advice like, 'It's not the size of the hero's body, but the size of the hero's heart."

Grabbing the waist high bird-boy, Concules looked him square in the eye as he picked him up and shook him roughly. "Look here, I need to become a true hero to live on Mount Watch and the only way I can do that is to have you train me."

"I can't do that!"

"Why not?"

"Two words muscle head, I…am…retired!"

"That's not two words, that's three. Learn to count bird brian!"

"Yeah, like you're changing my mind about training you, bicep boy!"

"Fine." Tossing the younger lad back on the ground, Concules headed over to a semi buried statue and ripped it out of the ground. "I'll give you a reason to train me."

After widening his stance, the super strong youth hurled the large statue far into the ocean. A large splash could be seen where it landed, which made Rob's eyes widen in shock and jaw fall to the floor. Concules simply slapped his hands free of any dirt. "If that's not good enough, then how's this?"

Heading back over to Wolfasus, Concules pulled out a dagger and proceeded to stab himself in the heart. Rob yelled for him to stop and couldn't believe his eyes when he saw the dagger bent and break upon refusal to pierce the teen's chest.

"Whoa, wait a minute. If you're that strong, maybe I could tra…nah, forget it. You'll just end up like all the others."

"What others? How many people have you trained?"

"Well, Jason for one; taught him how to sail. Odysseus, Perseus, Theseus. A ton of "yeuseus." Anyway, every single one of those wannabes let me down flatter than a discus. Not a one could go the distance. And then there was Achilles. He had it all, the build, the speed, he could jab, he could take a hit, he could keep on comin' back for more... but that jacked up heel of his! He barely got nicked there and BOOM! He's down for the count. I wanted to train the greatest hero there ever was, so great that the Gods would hang a picture of him in the stars and people would say, "That's Rob's boy." But dreams are for rookies and a guy can only take so much disappointment."

Concules took a knee before the trainer of heroes and softened his gaze. "I'm different. I'm not like those other guys."

"And why should I believe you?"

"Because…I'm…kinda the son of Supes."

"Supes."

"Yeah," Concules said as he rubbed the back of his neck like he was embarrassed to reveal such information.

Letting out a cackle, Rob couldn't believe his ears. "Supes! The big blue guy? He's your daddy? Mister spit curl? Mister 'Don't tug on my cape'? Yeah right."

"It's the truth!"

"Please!"

"It is!" Concules stomped the ground hard, making the water in the lake ripple from the force.

"I may be young but I wasn't born yesterday, blockhead. So the bottom line is I'm not going to train you and if you need me to spell it out then-" Before he could say another word, a beam of red energy shot from the sky and struck Rob on the hind end, setting his tail feathers on fire.

With a scream, the hero trainer dove into the water to put himself out. "Like I said, I'll spell it out for you, O. K."

"You'll do it? You'll train me?" Concules said as he helped him out of the lake and drug him onto the bank by an arm.

"Yeah, yeah, you win! Now let me go! You're yanking my arm out of socket!"

"You won't be sorry, Rob. So when do we start?"

"Oh, Supers, this is gonna be a looooong day."

It took some time to get Concules to prepare the training grounds according to Rob's specifications. Grass was trimmed, trees were removed roots and all, without the use of an ax or saw, and obstacle platforms were built. Hours upon hours were spent on getting his already built physique into an even more impressive shape but not all of his training was physical. Rob threw in several mental challenges as well while reciting rules for when he was executing various objectives while running an ever changing obstacle course. He lost count of how many togas he lost because of this.

One such rule was Rule #6: When rescuing a damsel, always handle with care. Concules had already gone through forty seven of the practice dummy damsels before he managed to get one all the way to the finish line without it suffering an injury. The worst was the one that caught on fire, skewered with a spear, decapitated, amputated, gutted of its stuffing, and losing its clothing, leaving only a burlap hand for Concules to rescue. All that happened before he even got it to the start of the course.

Rule #95 was Concentrate as he was quick to anger and was easily frustrated, but he learned to control it eventually. Missing various moving targets, Concules almost gave up and smashed them with his bare hands when he took a deep breath and succeeded in hitting the bull's eye of one of them with his last throwing dagger. When he looked over at Rob for approval, he saw the youthful bird-boy pinned to the wall by the other daggers with one dangerously close to his crotch from all the times Concules missed while practicing his blind throws. To this Rob shouted, 'Rule #96: Aim!'

It took some time but as the years went past, Concules became an image of what a hero should look like with a strong muscular build but not overly developed. Rob was sure he was better built than Achilles ever was.

"Did you see that?" the now adult Concules asked. "I took out all the practice monsters and recued the damsel faster than I ever have. Next stop, Mount Watch."

"All right, just take it easy, Supey," Rob told him.

"Rob, I am ready. I'm ready to get off this island. I want to battle criminals and monsters while rescuing some damsels in distress. You know, heroic stuff."

"Well, I don't know."

"Aw, come on, Rob. You know I'm ready. I know I'm ready. And you know that I know that you know that I'm ready. So what do you say?"

"That sentence has just out whelmed me that it's not even funny. But if you want a road test then saddle up, big guy. We're going to Metropolis. It's a city filled with good people with lots of problems. But first you need to dress the part. Togas don't really say 'hero'.

Taking his protégé back to the weapons vault within the bird shaped mountain, Concules was outfitted with a leather cuirass that resembled armor, which was something he didn't need as he was invincible, and leather strips that covered his legs. A red cape flowed behind him as a statement of his lineage to the Gods. This was quickly replaced with a pair of dark cerulean trousers and a black leather top with black leather sandals that covered his feet more. When asked about his decision on his choice of clothing by Rob, he replied with a 'No skirt, no cape, no offense.' The last thing Rob made sure to do, besides pack enough leather tops for replacements, was create an area on each top so the new hero may wear his red metal shield.

"Here, now that you're dressed for success, you may want to take this with you." Rob handed Concules a weightless metallic sphere, which the hero in training looked over carefully.

"A ball. You gave me a ball."

"Actually, it's a weapon."

"Well, I guess I can throw it-"

"No, you don't throw it," Rob said as if it were obvious of what he wanted him to do. "Just imagine a weapon while holding it and it'll become what you are thinking."

Doing as he said, Concules imagined a spear and the sphere molded into the exact image in his mind. Liking what he saw, he next pictured a sword and the sphere molded into that as well, then another, and another.

"Whoa, what's that?" Rob asked as the weapon became a sword hilt with a beam of light coming out of it.

"I don't know," he said as he waived it around. It hummed with every pass it took in the air. "But it looks kinda cool."

"Well, whatever it is, it's extremely hot. In the meantime, put it away and saddle up, cause we're out of here."

The two flew to Metropolis on Wolfasus with a full list of heroic things to accomplish once they arrived in the city. Unfortunately they lost it when the flying wolf hit some light turbulence between Gotham and Star City.

"Wow! Is this all one city? " Concules asked upon landing.

"Yup," Rob said. "One city with a million troubles. The one and only Metropolis. The big enchilada itself. Stick with me, big guy. This city is a dangerous place."

The two ventured around the city with Wolfasus close behind them. While passing by numerous people, they overheard every problem imaginable from a tragic fire, barbequed cats, earthquakes, floods, the ever rising crime rate, monsters, plagues, and many, many more. It was after an hour when the panicked cries of a woman came from down the street and a young auburn haired woman in a white and red toga with a blue cloak flowing behind her came into view.

"Please! Help me!" the woman yelled. "There's been an accident!"

"Ooh, what luck," Rob said while elbowing his trainee, "your basic D.I.D, damsel in distress."

Concules stared at her and didn't realize his jaw had fallen open.

"Please, I need a hero! He's got to be strong, he's gotta be fast, and he's gotta be larger than life!" the young woman continued saying. "Outside of town, a little girl was playing in the gorge and there was a terrible rock slide. They're trapped!"

"A trapped kid?" Concules said. "Rob, this is great!"

"What's great about a trapped kid?" an elderly man asked. "Who are you?"

"I'm Concules and I happen to be a hero."

"A hero?" a woman asked. There's no more heroes left anymore. They all live on Mount Watch and only come down when something big happens."

"Well not me."

"Have you ever saved a town before?" another man asked.

"Well, uh, no, not exactly, but I-"

"Have you ever reversed a natural disaster?" a woman carrying three screaming infants asked.

Concules rubbed the back of his head. "Well, uh... no."

"He's just another chariot chaser!" a man yelled.

"I am not!"

"Are too!"

"ARE NOT!" Concules was beginning to lose his temper.

"You're no hero, just a wannabe!"

"I AM TO A HERO AND I'LL PROVE IT! Wolfasus, come on. You too, you're going to show me where the brat is so I can save her." The hero made his way over to his pet and the woman who alerted them all to the problem at hand.

"The name's M'gra or Meg as my friends call me, if I had any that is, whoa, hey!" Tossing the white and red robed woman over a shoulder, Concules mounted his flying wolf and shot skyward.

"Wait, wait, I have this terrible fear of Heiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiights!" She had no choice but to hang on for dear life.

It didn't take long for the two to arrive at the gorge and begin looking for the little girl. The woman, who held on tightly to him, was completely dis-shelved with her hair in a mess and toga completely wrinkled.

"Um…sorry," Concules told her as he helped her down from Wolfasus' back. "I kinda-"

"Need to work on controlling your temper?" the woman told him as she straightened out her clothing and hair.

"I…I'm sorry.

"Yeah, well, just get the girl out. She's down there under that boulder at the far end of the area." She looked him up and down as he headed into the gorge and admired his physique. "And Superboy," she shouted with a grin, drawing his attention. "Good luck."

Maybe it was how pretty she looked or the way she looked at him when he first saw her in the city, then there was the fact that she was the first woman his age he had seen in a year, but his thoughts kept going back to her. Being around her even made him feel calm, at peace. He continued to head to the boulder she had pointed out when he heard the cries of a little girl coming from ahead of him

"Help! I can't breathe!" the small voice shouted.

"I'm coming!" Concules yelled.

"Hurry! Get me out! Call IX-I-I! I can't last much longer!"

With a grunt, the super strong young man lifted the boulder over his head and freed the little blonde girl underneath. She looked up at him with a smile as she came skipping out happily.

"Jeepers Mister, you're really strong."

"Thanks," her savior said as he tossed the heavy object to the side. "Now just, try to stay out of trouble."

"I sure will. Thanks again."

As the little girl ran off, a crowd of people from the city and Rob applauded, somewhat, for the hero who had save the child. No one noticed the little girl climb up a cliff and looked back as a dark cloud formed behind her and a tall, gaunt, bald man with flames on his head stood behind her, clapping softly.

"A stirring performance, I was really moved," he said. "But 'Jeepers, Mister'?"

The little girl looked up at him. "I was going for innocence, Lord Lexdes." She then turned into a woman with short blonde hair and wore a gray toga.

"And, two thumbs way, way up for our leading lady, M'gra," Lexdes said as said woman joined them. She had her head down and covered by her blue hood with her shoulder length hair tucked behind her. "What a doll. Without you and Mercic doing your parts, I would never have been able to get rid of so many heroes."

Looking down into the gorge, M'gra could only barely whisper, "Get outta there while you still can, big guy."

"Tuh, can't they at least be grateful I saved the girl?" Concules muttered as he looked the crowd over. That was when the rumbling began.

Looking back, he saw a large cavern in the side of the cliff. Not thinking much of it at the time, he wondered if he should have put the boulder back after he lifted it, but it was too late. With a loud hiss, a large blue skinned serpent emerged from the hole and stood over the surprised hero. With an incredibly fast strike, it swallowed him in a single gulp.

The crowd let out an exasperated breath at the sight of the hero being eaten alive and cowered in fear as the serpent targeted them next. Before it could strike, a metal object exploded from the side of its neck and went about decapitating the beast. The crowd cheered as Concules fell out of the monster's throat.

Rob and Wolfasus were the first ones over to check if he were okay. He turned around and held up his five long tail feathers "Con, Con, how many feathers do you see?"

"Ugh, fifteen?" he replied.

"Close enough. Come on, let's get you out of here."

Above the gorge, M'gra looked on and was relieved that Concules was alive and okay. She had a small grin on her face until she overheard Lexdes. "If you can't beat them one on one, call for back up."

Not even twenty feet from the serpent's body, Rob and Concules heard another rumble and turned to look at the creature stand back up and sprout three new heads. They all looked down hungrily at the hero.

"This is so not asterus," Rob said.

"What does that mean?" Concules asked.

"Two words, Am-scray!"

As Rob took off in a dead sprint, Concules dodged an attack by the monster. Wolfasus landed nearby to allow him to climb on and the two took to the sky to do battle. Grabbing the sphere, Concules formed it into a sword and went about cutting the creature's heads off. One by one they fell but each freshly cut nub grew two more in its place until he and Wolfasus were facing an army of serpent heads.

"Rob!" Concules yelled. "I don't think we covered this one in basic training!"

"Will you forget the head-slicing thing?" Rob yelled. "It's a Hydra! It'll keep growing more if you keep cutting them off and not sealing the wounds!"

"Sealing the wounds?" Thinking back to when he formed the light sword, Concules remembered how hot it felt and immediately made the sphere morph into the choice weapon.

He began to re-cut the hydra's head and this time none grew back as the sword instantly cauterized the stumps and prevented any more from growing. Concules did his best to dodge the remaining serpent heads but they eventually managed to knock Wolfasus out of the air and the young hero along with him. He was then pinned to the side of the nearest cliff with his weapon falling to the ground.

With no options left, Concules stared down the hydra as it reared its left over heads back and opened dozens of sharp-toothed mouths. They all charged at him at once, dead set on making him their meal. With the sight of all those teeth closing in on him, Concules resorted to the only thing he could think of. He bashed the side of the cliff with his fists and caused an avalanche of boulders to fall upon the monster and didn't stop until the entire thing was crushed, heads, body, and all.

"And another one bites the dust." Lexdes said as he slurped up a worm like a pasta noodle. "Mercic, how many heroes does that make that I've taken-"

"Sir, he's not dead." Mercic told him.

"What?"

Looking down at the battleground, Lexdes saw several boulders move and fall to the side. Up stood Concules who was now missing most of his leather top. He took a step forward and tumbled out of the rubble with the crowd cheering and applauding loudly as he stood back up.

"You did it, Big Guy! You killed the hydra!" Rob shouted as he and Wolfasus ran up to the worse for wear hero.

"Yeah, well, I guess that was heroic," he told his buddy.

Above the event, M'gra bit her lower lip and smiled under her hood. "Well, way to go, Superboy."

"Wait a second, I've seen him before. I've seen that symbol on his chest before." Lexdes said as he looked closer at the day's savior.

"Maybe you owe him money?" Mercic said as she filed her nails. "You aren't exactly known for paying your poker debts."

Ignoring her, he turned to M'gra. "Did he tell you his name?"

"He…he said it was Con…Concules," the young woman hesitantly told him.

"WHAT?!" The fire on Lexdes head exploded at that name. "That's Concules? The Concules? Son of Supes? Mercic, I thought you got rid of Superbrat when he was an infant!"

"Um, well…you see…it could be another Concules. It's a very popular name." The blonde woman backed up against a wall as she continued to try and explain. "Remember how a few years ago the girls were all named Bella and the boys were all named Edward? Well…"

"Let me get this straight, I'm trying to rid the world of heroes so that I may rule it, and the one schlemiel who can louse it up is waltzing around in the woods! I gave you a very specific order to take him out. To kill the next generation of heroes and you didn't do that?!"

"Well, I…there was a woman who was going to see me kill him and she was carrying a torch and, well…I did make him mortal, kinda."

"Fortunately for the two of you, we have been granted an opportunity to save face. Mercic, you will keep an eye on that boy while M'gra, my sweet, I have an idea of what you can do to him. I'm about to throw him a few curves he won't be able to ignore. Unless, you want to go back to your old self now, would you? Meg?"

M'gra wrapped her arms around herself and shook her still covered head with a worried expression etched on her freckled face.

"Good." He reached into a pouch and produced a small glowing green orb. "Now…here's what you're going to do."

It didn't take long for Concules to find himself in the middle of a fame tornado and was so hot that steam itself looked cool. Everywhere he went, hundreds and thousands of people screamed his name at the sight of him. The rich would throw gold coins in his wake with the poor being surprised when he gave them a large sum of it. In fact, he had so much money, he actually had cash to burn. He didn't actually burn it, but he could. He sent some back to Kalryon and the orphanage, turning it into more of a mansion for the homeless children.

Every weekly Greek opinion poll had him as the person of the week and artists slapped his face on every vase…vahse…however you pronounce it. A shoe line, Con-Air was made for him and was dubbed 'The coolest kicks in and out of the labyrinth'. Women lined the streets to see him ride by on Wolfasus, oohing and ahhing as he flexed, as well as getting glimpses of the perfect package's pretty pecs. The believers of another rising religion would say, "Amen" or "Bless my soul, Con is on a roll" as he went off to battle every threat to the city. He was sweet and undefeated with the judges ranking his fighting style ten for ten.

He was a no one, a zero. But he soon put the 'super' in superhero and went from being a zero to a hero just like that.

"Rob!" Concules yelled as he ran through his new villa home, which sat atop of a mountain overlooking the ocean. "Rob! Help!"

He didn't know how they got in or how they knew where he was in his home, but three of those he wished to keep outside had broken in and interrupted his relaxing steam. He was now in a chase for his life with barely any time to get his pants and boots on.

"ROB, YOU LITTLE BIRD BRAINED IDIOT! HELP ME!"

"Escape plan Beta!" the bird-boy yelled as his trainee was tackled and devoured before him, not by monsters, but something far worse; a group of screaming fan girls.

"I got his boots!" one of the girls yelled.

"I got a lock of hair!" shouted another.

"I got his t-shirt!" the third one screeched.

"That makes one hundred and fifty two times he's lost it this month! The first girl said. "Eight more time and we reach one sixty!"

"Concules," Rob shouted as he looked out of the building, "why are you running out to the veranda?"

His superb acting was enough to make the girls head outside in search for him when they couldn't find him anymore with Rob close behind. A crazed grin spread on his face as he chased after the girls.

With his home now empty, a lite taping of leather soles filled the air. They were so lite in fact; it was like the person making them was partly flying over the floor. "Con…Concules?"

Peeking from behind a curtain, the hero spotted a blue cloaked figure and came out of hiding at the sound of her voice. "M'gra!"

"Con! Oh, you're…you're…"

"Uh…sorry." Turning around quickly, Concules grabbed a new leather top. Boots, and pants since his were torn to shreds. "Just, uh, give me a minute."

"It's all right. The sea of raging hormones has ebbed." She looked around at his mountaintop home and couldn't help but be amazed. "So, this is what heroes do on their days off."

"I'm…I'm no hero." He came out from behind the curtain where he was hiding and fixed his red shield back into place.

"Sure you are," she said with a smile. "Everybody in Greece thinks you're the greatest thing since they put the pocket in pita."

"Well…" Concules said with a chuckle. It's just been real crazy. I can't go anywhere without being mobbed. I'm not used to it is all."

Looking back at the muscular teen, M'gra hid a blush when she saw him smile at her. "You, uh, you sound like you could use a break. Think mother hen would go nuts if you disappeared for a while? I know someplace you would like."

He smiled at her offer. Her invitation was all it for him to forget the rest of his schedule for the day.

"Okay, Big Guy," Rob said as he re-entered the home, with a clipboard in his hands and lipstick on his face. "I got them to leave, so now we can get back on schedule. You've got a meeting with King Augeas at noon, tea with the Daughters of the Greek Revolution at two, and then it's off to the Amazons to retrieve a girdle. I think you may need help with that one so I'll, he he, be coming along to- Hey, where'd you go?"

Looking around, he found he was completely alone.

What was supposed to be a quick getaway for Concules had turned into a full day of hanging out with M'gra. The two spent time at a bayside restaurant, caught a play, and enjoyed time watching the sun set. It was already evening when the two found themselves in a large garden full of blooming flowers, trees, and statues.

"You, uh, mind if we sit for a while?" M'gra asked.

"Yeah, no problem." Bending down, Concules picked up a rock and tossed it several times from one hand to the other. "Can I tell you something?"

"Sure, anything," M'gra said as she took out a necklace with the small green orb Lexdes had given her.

"When I was a kid I, I would have given anything to be normal like everybody else."

"Normal? You mean you wanted to be petty and dishonest?"

"Not everybody's not like that."

"Yes they are." She palmed the necklace in her hand and closed her fingers around it.

"You're not like that," he said, looking back at her.

"Con, how do you know what I'm like?"

"I just…the time we had today, the things we talked about, I just feel like you're, you're the most honest person I have ever met. And even though I'm surrounded by people all the time, and Rob…when I'm with you I, I don't feel so alone."

A moment passed as M'gra contemplated his words. She closed her eyes and thought of what she had gone through before she met Lexdes. "Sometimes it's better to be alone. Nobody can hurt you that way."

"Meg, I would never, ever hurt you."

She dropped the necklace on the ground and let it fall between two stones in the walkway. "And I don't ever wanna hurt you." She was taken by surprise when she found him sitting behind her and took her face in his hands.

"You won't," he said as he the two drew close.

"Superboy…Con, Concules…we can't…people do stupid things…when there in…in love. We need to...stop this...before...we-"

They were so incredibly close to having their lips touching when a metal object smacked him upside the head and broke the two apart.

"Ow, what the…Sphere?" Reaching down, he picked up the metal ball and looked it over.

"Pet of yours?" M'gra asked. She was disappointed they didn't go through with the kiss but tried to hide it by asking the question.

"Sort of, I-"

"Geez Louise! What is going on here?" Appearing in a cloud of smoke rising from the ground, Lexdes gave the two an accusing stare.

"Who are you?" Concules demanded as he had Sphere become a sword and stood in front of M'gra.

"Name's Lexdes, Lord of Dead Heroes. Hi, how ya doin'?"

"Whatever you want, you're-"

"Oh, I'm going to get what I want. I always do." Lexdes extended a hand behind him and summoned the necklace to him without the two noticing what he was doing. "All I require is a moment of your time. See, I've got a major deal in the works. A real estate venture, if you will. And Con, may I call you Con? You seem to be the only one in my way, so I would be eternally grateful if you would just…take a day off from this hero business of yours, okay?"

"Get out of here."

"Not so fast, because, you see, I do have a little leverage you might wanna know about." With a snap of his fingers, M'gra was levitated to him and wrapped up in ropes with a gag over her mouth.

"Meg! Let her go!" Concules yelled. His anger welled up inside and was ready to be unleashed should she be hurt.

"Here's the tradeoff. You wear this necklace for about 24 hours without taking it off, the next 24 hours, and your girl here is free as a bird and safe from harm. You two can then dance, kiss, schmooze, carry on, go home happy, get busy, pump out a few super babies and such, what d'ya say?"

"You're, you're going to hurt people, aren't you?"

"Why do you care? What do you owe these people, huh? They made fun of you. Spurned you. Belittled and ridiculed you. But isn't Meg, your little smoochy face, worth more than they are? Isn't she?"

"Stop it!" Concules yelled. "You have to swear she'll be safe from any harm."

With a grin, Lexdes trusted the necklace at the young hero. "Deal. Now put it on."

Looking at the bound woman, Concules put the necklace on without hesitation and immediately felt the energy being sucked out of him. All the strength he possessed was taken from his body and he soon fell to his hands and knees.

"YES!" Lexdes yelled. The strength the young hero possessed filled his body and gave him a huge power boost. "The power! The last of the heroes' powers are mine!"

Looking down at the weakened hero, Lexdes wound up and landed a kick to his midsection. "Now you know how it feels to be just like everybody else. Oh, and one more thing. Meg, darling, a deal's a deal. You'll never look like your old self again, which is an improvement of what you were before." He turned back to the downed hero. By the way, Conny boy. Is she not, like, a fabulous little actress." He turned to the still bound young woman and patted the side of her face. "Couldn't have done it without you, sugar."

"What, what do you mean?" Concules asked weakly.

"I mean your little chickie-poo here was working for me all the time. She so wanted to look like everyone else and not horribly deformed. Mercic, come, we have a job to do."

"Jeepers Mister, you're really stupid!" Mercic appeared and kicked Concules in the face. "Looks like the hero's a zero!"

"Hey, get away from him!" Hopping over the fence, Rob ran up to Concules' side with Wolfasus doing the same. "What happened?"

Before he could answer, M'gra was freed and fell to the ground. She then ran up to Concules and took him in her arms. "Please, please give him his strength back!" she pleaded with Lexdes.

"A deal's a deal, babe. And now I'm off to collect my prize, all of humanity."

"Come on, Big Guy, You've got to get up and fight back," Rob told his friend. "You can take this bum, he's a pushover."

Sitting up and shrugging off M'gra's hold on him, he stared down at the ground the finally back up at Rob. "Rob, you were right all along." He then looked back at a teary M'gra. "Dreams are for rookies."

"Concules, I'm sorry," M'gra said as tears ran down her face. "I was born deformed and, and, Lexdes, he made me normal and…you can't give up. You can't quit."

"She's right, Con. I decided to train you because you wanted to go this distance, farther than any other hero I know. Giving up's for rookies and that ain't you. I went the distance for you, are you willing to keep going as well?"

Across the garden, Lexdes and Mercic prepared to rain down fire and brimstone on the unsuspecting people of the world as they made their way to the exit. Lexdes flexed his fists repeatedly, thoroughly enjoying the feel of the newfound strength in his body when he was tackled from behind.

"Who dares…Superbrat? I'll-"

Concules didn't give him time to finish as the sword he wielded became a long hammer and slammed into Lexdes' face. He went crashing into several statues but recovered quickly.

"Mercic, take him down!"

Firing a blast of fire from her arm, Mercic closed in on the powerless hero who had managed to morph his sword into a shield and block the blaze. The heat increased as Lexdes' minion drew closer and continued to pour on the flames. Biding his time, Concules fended off the attack and ducked behind several statues. The moment Mercic stop her flame throwing, he hurled his shield at her and connected with her head. The weapon returned to him as she fell to the floor unconscious.

"Not so fast Superboy," Lexdes said as he appeared behind him. A back hand sent the hero sailing across the yard into a stone wall. "I was content in leaving you alone but since you want to die so badly I'll be more than happy to, AGH!"

Attacking the super powered villain from behind was Wolfasus who clamped down hard on his leg.

"Stupid mutt!" The animal was smacked off easily but only just before several saucer-like rocks collided with Lexdes' head.

"Lousy bird-boy!" He blasted the spot Rob was a second before being hit with a club by M'gra. He wasn't paying attention as he backhanded her into a shallow pool where she hit her head on its bottom.

"M'gra!" Concules yelled as he ran to her and scooped her up. "M'gra, wake up, please."

An eruption of light surrounded both Concules and Lexdes at that moment and instantly, the youth felt re-energized. The necklace he agreed to wear fell from his neck and disintegrated into nothing. His strength came surging back and Lexdes was once again without power as his part of the deal was broken, making it null and void.

"DRAH! You little…fine, you may have won the battle, but I've got the prize. You're girlfriend's soul, muscle boy. I'll make sure she forever walks the earth, knowing how ugly and unloved she really is!"

A cloud of smoke surrounded Lexdes as he prepared to transport himself and Mercic back to the underworld but not before Concules charged him and was teleported there as well.

"Get off me!" Lexdes yelled as he and the youth tumbled on the floor of his cavernous domain. "You won, I lost. Let bygones be bygones and let me be!"

"Give me back Meg!" Concules yelled as he readied a fist to implode Lexdes' head.

"Okay, okay, you can have her. She's right down there." He pointed to a whirling green pool filled with souls with M'gra's among the ones at the top. "She's yours. take her and be gone."

Without thinking, Concules leapt in after her.

"Oh, before I forget," Lexdes yelled form the edge of the pool. "You'll be dead by the time you reach her! I hope that isn't a problem, muscle head!"

As Concules swam ever deeper, his skin began to wrinkle and age rapidly. His hair turned gray and his muscles began to deteriorate. He knew he was dying but he continued to swim forward, never giving up on reaching M'gra's soul.

Above the pool, Lexdes grinned and snorted, feeling the triumph that, despite his plans going awry, he had still won. He has succeeded in ridding the world of another hero, leaving it for him to take over. He left the edge to head back to his planning room when he heard a rock break from behind him.

"What? How is this…you, you can't be alive! You'd have to be a, a-"

"A Superhero?" Mercic said.

Standing before him with the soul of M'gra in his arms was Concules. A yellow aura of light enshrouded him as he gave Lexdes a death glare.

"Concules…it, it's impossible. You should be dead. YOU SHOULD BE DEAD!"

Stomping towards him, Lexdes was prepared to kill him himself when Concules grabbed him by the throat and chokeslamed him to the ground.

"Know this," he angrily told him, "The heroes are back. So get on board, or get the Hades out of our way." He shoved him into the dirt deeper and walked off.

Not letting his defeat stand, Lexdes charged the hero from behind with the full intent to kill him when Concules turned and unleashed a yell as he landed a punch that had all of his anger and strength behind it to the face of the Lord of the Dead Heroes. The villain sailed across the ground and fell into the pool where the souls were and was taken down by them. He began to age rapidly but with those in the pool holding him down, he was soon turned to nothing at all. As for the souls, they were freed of their prison and flew out of the pool to the sky above.

Back on earth, Concules gently held M'gra's soul in his arms. He looked down upon her and saw the true way she looked. Her brow was sticking out slightly and her hair was missing. Her skin was a strange greenish coloring and she looked rather sickly. Despite her looking this way, she was still the most beautiful girl he had ever seen or knew. She was real.

Coming up to where Rob and Wolfasus were, Cocules knelt down next to M'gra's earthly body and placed her soul in it. He held her close as he waited for her to wake up and when she did, he let out a long held breath.

"Superboy, Concules, what, what happened?" She meekly asked.

"Like you said, 'People do crazy things, when they're in love."

He leaned in to kiss her when a white cloud appeared under them and lifted them skyward. Wolfasus grabbed Rob by his tail feathers and flew after the two, much to the bird-boy's objection. They arrived at a tall, gleaming tower in the sky and knew it was Mount Watch, home to the greatest heroes of all time.

"Supey's here! Hey Supey's here!" a red haired teen shouted as he ran across the sky to meet them. "I'm Wallmes, God of Quick Messages. I just got words of your heroic deed and, well, who cares what I have to say, you saved the day and all the heroes are waiting for you. Three Cheers for the mighty Concules! Yeah, baby! Chicken Whizzies for everybody!"

"Hooray for the Superboy, Concules," the God of feminine archery, Artemis, shouted as they passed by her post. She drew an arrow from her quiver and launched it skyward where it exploded in dozens upon dozens of colors.

"Hah! You've done it, my boy. You are a true hero," Supes said as the two cloud riders came to a stop at the front of the tower.

"We are so proud of you" Diera said as she hugged him. "You were willing to give tour life for this young woman. That right there is a sign of a true hero."

"For a true hero isn't measured by the size of his strength, but by the strength of his heart. Now, at last, you can come home where you belong."

Looking up at the tower, the newest of the heroes stared in awe at what lay before him. It was everything he wanted, a home, acceptance, a family. Then it hit him. He already had that and he didn't need to prove he was worthy of it to begin with.

As Concules stared at the tower, M'gra wiped a tear from her face at the thought of not seeing him again as mortals couldn't live amongst the heroes of Mount Watch. "Congratulations, Concules, Superboy. You'll make one heck of a hero."

As she turned to walk away, a hand grabbed her from behind, She turned back and was surprised to find Concules standing beside her. "Supes, this is the moment I've always dreamed of, but, a life without M'gra, even an immortal one, would be empty. I'm going to stay on Earth with her. I finally know where I belong."

He leaned down and kissed the woman he had fallen in love with and she eagerly kissed him back. Supes nodded to Artemis who fired another arrow into the heavens where it exploded into the design of his shield where it stayed suspended for all eternity as the heroes celebrated and Wallmes danced the cabbage patch.

Opening his eyes slowly and inhaling deeply, Conner looked around without moving his head. The expression on his face was one of embarrassment and guilt about him having a dream that was so corny and out of character for him that he hoped he hadn't said anything like the time he had first watched 300 and shouted 'Sparta' in his sleep.

Looking down, he saw M'gann sleeping soundly and carefully moved from under her. He then picked her up and carried her off to her room, leaving Wally sleeping on the floor in what appeared to be a puddle of drool.

"Conner?" she said tiredly as he carried her down the hall.

"Yeah?"

"Can you hold me all night?"

"Yeah."

"And under the sea?"

He stopped mere feet from her door. "What?"


	7. Chicken Wal

Chicken Wal

The following movie has been rated 'W' for "Wallicious" and is only for those who reek of awesomeness.

This is a true story. A story biased on the truth. A very truthful truthy story that oozes the truth at every corner that you may not be able to handle it all. But rest assured; it is all true. And like all stories of great truth, it starts with a big fat lie.

Happy Harbor – Sometime in the morning but I don't know when because I don't own a watch.

Sitting beneath a tree, I was minding my own business. Really, I was just an innocent pawn who didn't know what was about to happen. Yeah I kinda was checking out the chicks walking by while pretending to read a newspaper. (Seriously, does anyone read newspapers anymore?) Anyway, My fine, hunky, orange and yellow feathered self, oh, my name's Chicken Wal by the way, was sitting in the park one day when something hit me on the head. I mean it just flat out conked me on my perfectly shaped head and left me with such a bruise that I was now deformed.

As I looked down, I saw it was an octagonal, that's an object with eight sides, object lying on the ground. It was blue with white streaks on it, which made it look like the sky. In fact, it was the sky! After looking up I saw a hole the same size of the object in the sky and it hit me. It hit me like an octagonal object that the sky was falling!

Acting quick, (Because that's what geniuses do, act quick, and I happen to be a genius.) I ran to the nearby school house and rang the bell with all my might. I yelled about the emergency that was happening as well as our impending doom that, that, well…this is where it gets embarrassing for your ol' pal, Chicken Wal. You see, when the townspeople got where I was, I told them what had happened, I told them that the sky was falling and led them to where it happened, but could find no evidence it happened, so everyone thought it didn't happen. (See, that's the lie right there. Something happened and it appeared as if nothing happened.)

That was a year ago and I still can't live it down. People are still making fun of me like, 'There goes Chicken Wal, he…he…" well I'm not too good at insults myself but they can be pretty mean. They even made a movie about me called 'Crazy little Chicken'. I'm not crazy! (My mother had me tested.) I'm a genius! It's not my fault I was the victim of a drive by Newtoning! (Sigh) Anyway, on with my story.

Happy Harbor – Morning before school starts. (Yeah, a year later and I still don't own a watch.)

My uncle, the amazing track champion known as Flash Cluck, was driving me to school on another bright, sunny day. In fact, it was just another normal day for yours truly.

"Okay, you remember what we talked about last night?" my uncle asked me as we sat in his car in front of my school. "Just go in there and pretend you're playing a game of hide and seek, only when you hide, make sure no one can find you."

"Yeah, I still don't get that. I mean if-"

"CW, It's only been a year and the people still remember what you did. Remember the endless nights of having our house egged? Egging a chicken's house, that's like dogs doing their business in their own yards."

"But uncle, I-"

"And then there's the shaving cream on my car. And I don't know what they did to my gas tank. I mean, why pour lemonade in my gas tank? But at least we didn't need to buy toilet paper for several months with the amount they threw on the trees."

"Well it was great until you ran out after eating seventeen bean burritos during halftime. That was…not too good." I gave him a sly smile and moved to open the door.

"Just…have a nice day Chicken Wal."

"You too, uncle." I took off for class as fast as I could when I heard the bell ring. For being the fastest chicken in town, I was always late. (That's what we call an oxymoron, kiddies. Or is it irony? Who cares, I'm a genius.) But who knew my one little slip a year ago would lead to a fusion of confusion with a few confounding things?

Anyway, I got to class just in time for roll call. The teacher, a dark furred sheep with eels sheered into his fur named Kaully Lolli paced back and forth before the class and didn't notice when I snuck in. I'm a ninja like that.

"Next on the list is, Con Bon," Kaully Lolli called as I stealthily took my seat.

The big guy in class, Con Bon, only grunted his response. No one messed with him as he was so…so…moody and scary looking. It must be a wolf thing. In fact, the only one in class to even look at him was my friend, but more on her later.

"Dinary Canary," the teacher called next. She only waived her hand as she hardly ever talked. She didn't exactly have an inside voice.

"Miss Meg of the Litter." Kaullly called, only to see her mindlessly staring at Con Bon who was busy slouching in his seat with his arms crossed. "Meg of the Litter? Miss Meg!"

"Oh, uh…present and accounted for, sir," Meg said as she snapped out of her day dream and sat straight up. Her hands fiddled with her mauve cardigan nervously. She was the only different colored one in her family (a green furred vixen) and was a little on the, shall we say, air head side of the brain pool. To prove this, she actually had a crush on Con Bon since she first laid eyes on him but never said anything more than 'I like your shirt'. She even wrote his and her names all over her text books. The next kid who gets her math book will forever think 1 + 1 = Con heart Meg. Anyways, she was nice and fit into my group of friends quite well.

"Olly Dolly," the teacher continued.

"Yo." Olly Dolly, the coolest kid at school, and the only one with a goatee, sat at the back of the room next to his girlfriend, Dinary Canary. He really only spoke in one syllable words. He is so cool.

"Rob out of air," Kaully called.

"Here and totally asterous." Rob said with a cackle. He was another of my friends who so happened to be a member of the aviary, or bird species to the lamest. He couldn't fly like me either, despite being a robin, but was one of the best buds a dud could have.

"Arty Mallard." Kaully stood in front of a quiet blonde duck, who was also my friend, and watched her as she fiddled with what looked like an arrow. "Miss Mallard, give me that."

"Awww," Arty whined. I nearly had it that time."

"Arts and crafts are for later. For now, we study Spanish."

"Uh, Mister Lolly, you didn't call my name," I announced.

"I don't have to. I already marked you tardy. Now class, turn to page sixty two of your books and we will learn the Spanish words for food."

(I guess my ninja skills need work.)

We did as he instructed and said every food item in Spanish as he called it out. The only ones who knew this stuff by heart were Con Bon and Meg. It was like they knew every language in the world.

"Taco," he said.

"Taco," we replied.

"Burrito."

"Burrito."

"Nachos."

"Nachos"

"Churro."

"Churro."

Yeah, Spanish is sooooo hard.

After I bombed the Spanish test, hey, geniuses can have off days too, it was time for gym class.

"OK, everyone, listen up!" the gym coach, Mister Red Turtle Nattle, bellowed after blowing his whistle. "I don't want to hear any quacks, tweets, cheeps, or whimpers when I say…Dodgeball! Now remember, this is a sport of degradation and exclusion so I want the popular kids to the right and unpopular on the left. Let's hustle!"

"Um, coach?" Meg said as she, me, Rob and Arty went to our side. "That makes four against twenty. Wouldn't it be better if we had, like, even tea-"

"Everyone aim for the green one!" the coach yelled as he blew his whistle.

Letting out a shriek, Meg ran as fast as she could from a barrage of red dodge balls as the popular kids tried their best to bean her on the head.

"Meg, just do what Rob is doing!" I yelled. To that, she began to copy Rob's moves but wasn't as smooth as he was. Seriously, if I were a ninja, he was a super ninja. He must have flipped and tumbled out of the way as each ball failed to hit him. Meg on the other hand…well…

"CW, incoming on the right!" Arty yelled. I acted fast and caught the ball then threw it back. I accidently threw it backwards and hit Meg by mistake, that is. "Tough morning?"

"My uncle basically told me to disappear but I'm not going to let that get me down." A dodgeball whizzed past my head and smacked Meg right on the butt.

"That's good to hear I hope you-"

"Warthog at three o'clock!"

"I see him." Catching a ball with one hand, Arty wound up and fired it at the one who threw it and beaned him right in the nay nays. "Yes, score!"

"Time out!" the coach yelled as he blew the whistle. I'll be back in a minute. I'm taking Batsy Laxty to the nurse." He led Batsy, a tall quiet Goth kid to the door who had two dodge balls impaled on his pointed ears. Instantly, the rest of the kids whipped out their phones and began to text the person directly next to them except for Con Bon who went about his traditional brooding.

"So tell me, what does the intellectual have up his sleeve to better himself with his uncle?" Arty said as she whipped a magazine out.

"Well, I have a plan to do something to make him forget about the whole 'sky is falling' thing by-"

"Oh, I have just the thing." Flipping through the pages at lightning speed, she turned to an article and nearly slammed it in my face. "Bam! According to Modern Mallard, you need closure with him. You also need to have a heart to heart discussion about your feelings, if you do not have one and let the problem continue to eat at your soul; it'll lead to early molting."

"But, if that happens…I'll need to wear sunscreen. And with how hot it gets in the summer, I'll be a fried chicken." I could just picture my tender, perfect white skin turning red from the sun's harmful rays. "Arty, listen, talking to my uncle is a waste of time. We're men. We don't have feelings. We eat, fart, sleep, and occasionally binge on pigs in blankets."

"(Sigh) Meg," Arty said as she faced Meg, "should Chicken Wal talk to his uncle and clear the air or keep looking for a Band-Aid solution?"

"Uh…" The green vixen looked at me then at Arty. Then me again and then Arty. "Um, Band-Aids?"

"Meg!"

"Sorry, I can't read people too good."

"Rob," Arty asked, turning to our other bird friend. "Help me out, he…oh never mind." To the side of the gym, Rob out of Air was off in his own little world as he pretended to be a ninja or something. "Ugh, men."

It went on like this for some time until the coach got back. The rest of the day came and went with me explaining my grand scheme to get my uncle to see me as more than a disappointment. It was all perfectly planned out; I had been working out for the last two months and gained five ounces. With all the bulking up I did, I would then join the baseball team and become a star. I mean, it's a game of timing, speed, strength, and angles. How hard could it be? All I needed was a chance.

Happy Harbor – Three months later sometime in the afternoon. Yeah, I still don't have a watch.

Okay, so here's my plan in detail. I play for the Happy Harbor Bees, I get to bat, I wait for the pitch, I knock it out of the park, and I win the game. I then become the hometown hero and my uncle accepts me as something better than a nerd. That was the plan and I was going to execute it flawlessly. Unfortunately, I never got a chance to actually hit, catch, or throw the ball all season long. And now we were in the championship little league game against our rivals, The Star City Taters.

All game long, I sat on the bench and drank cup after cup of sports drink. My uncle and friends sat in the middle of the bleachers and cheered for me as the rest of the parents and kids cheered for the other players. We were behind by a point, two to three, and Dinary Canary was up at bat. She hit it for a ground rule double and the crowd cheered loudly for her. Everyone waited for the next batter, Little Roy Rooster, as he headed out to the batter's box. He never got there as he tripped and sprang his ankle on his way out of the dugout.

What happened next? You won't believe it unless you were there to see it. But since I like you all, I'll tell you because you know I only speak the truth.

The first thing that happened was the coach screamed like a girl. Then Roy Rooster cried that his ankle was shattered. Con Bon, who's the power house of the team (DUH) scoffed at him as if it were a bother to him Roy was hurt. (And Meg likes this guy?) But it all worked out in the end as I, Chicken Wal Cluck, stepped up and took Roy's place with everyone cheering for me. Actually it was more like jeering but I pretended it was cheering.

Now, apparently there's more to the game of baseball than I thought. I just forgot to read the rules on batting. After correcting my mistake of facing the wrong way, I was now staring down the ball thrower (which I later learned was called the pitcher) and prepared myself to-

"Ball one!" the umpire yelled.

"Ball one," I shouted. "How was that a ball?"

"Look, kid. You're what, two inches tall?"

"No I'm not, I'm-"

"Look, you're too small you have a strike zone of any kind. So you're just gonna have to walk. Besides, I've seen roadkill with faster reflexes than you."

The ball was thrown again and was ruled a ball. Con Bon was warming up, getting ready to take his turn after me and win the game, as always. I could hear my coach yell 'Good job, don't swing" as well as my uncle. I had no choice in the matter. I HAD TO SWING.

The third ball came at me, I squatted down and swung with all my might.

I missed.

I had timed it wrong and heard the couch, players, and everybody yell at me not to swing. When the next pitch came my way…I swung and still missed it by a relative mile. By now, everyone was yelling, 'Don't swing! Don't swing!' But I swung. I swung because today is a new day. And I hit a Popfly deep into center field.

No one expected it to happen. The Taters all scrambled to recover the ball but it slipped out of their fingers. I rounded first, ran through the second baseman's legs, and headed for third. Dinary had made it home and tied the game, now it was up to me. As I headed for home, Con Bon ran up beside me and yelled how I'm not going to make it, that I needed to run faster. It was weird hearing him say more than just a grunt. But I had the need…the need, for speed. (The need came from me having to pee really bad by this point.)

The last thing I heard him yell was, 'SLIDE!' I slid and when the dust cleared…your pal Chicken Wal was S…A…F…E, safe. The crowd cheered, my teammates lifted me above their shoulders, I was doused with the yellow sports drink that would soak into my 'Adolescent Malformed Muay Thai Squirrels' underwear and would chaff for hours. I was a hero. (And being covered in sports drink helped hide the fact I didn't have to go pee anymore.)

Now, I would like to tell you everything was hunky dory after that. I would also like to tell you I could sing like Berry Manalouse, but I can't. My uncle was treating me like a winner instead of a wiener, weakling, loser. I was a somebody. I had bypassed cloud nine and was on cloud forty two. That is until déjà vu smacked me in the head.

Long story short, I was hit by another piece of the sky (Can you believe it?) right in the head. My head. My perfectly shaped, to scale, cute little chicken cranium was struck by the sky for the second time. But here's the freaky part…it wasn't the sky. It was a piece of…a machine of some sort. I quickly called Arty and Meg who were having a sleep over (And I wasn't invited! How fair is that?!) to tell them what had just happened.

"Hello?" Arty answered. "Party central, Arty Mallard speaking, how may I help you?"

"ArtyitsChickenWalIneedyoutoc omeovertomyhouseright-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow down, hold on. Meg! Meg, quit singing for a minute!"

I could hear Meg singing in the background and could swear she was changing the lyrics to suit her and (cough) Con Bon. "…So, Con Bon! (Yeah!) Con Bon! (Yeah) I really wanna know what's going on. So turn around! Stick it out! And I will always shout, Con Bon's got back!"

"MEG!" Arty shouted loudly.

Instantly, the singing stopped and I had to switch ears as the one I was using began to ring.

"Chicken Wal?"

"What?" I couldn't hear quite clear.

"What did you call for?"

"Who's on the floor?"

"What?"

"Meet me at the school house in ten minutes and call Rob." I looked down at the strange object. "Have I got something to show you."

Happy Harbor School House – Some time at night. I really need to get me a watch.

"Chicken Wal?" Arty called. "Chicken Wal? Where are you?"

"Are you s, s, sure he said to meet him here?" Meg asked. She was hunched down and shaking from fear.

"Woman up, Meg. Jeez. You're a vixen, a female fox, be brave."

"B,b, but, I never liked to go outside in the-"

"BOO!" Rob yelled as he summersaulted from the second story of the school house.

Meg let out a soul shredding scream so loud, I thought she was gonna pass out from fright. "ROB! DON'T DO THAT!"

"I'm sorry," he cackled. "I couldn't help myself. You were such an easy target."

"Sorry I'm late guys," I said as I came running up behind them. I had seen the whole thing from across the lawn. "I don't-"

"Have a watch, we know. Here." Reaching into her pocket, Arty pulled out and handed me a watch. "Maybe you won't be late next time."

"Thanks," I said as I slipped it on.

"So what did you want to show us?" Rob asked.

"This." I held up the piece of sky for them to see and flipped it over to show them the electronics on the back. They inspected it and ran their hands over it carefully like it was a newborn baby, wiggly, and full of juice.

"What is it?" Meg asked.

"It's a piece of the sky, at least that's what I thought at first."

"A piece of the sky?" Arty asked. "Are you insane? You just got over being a joke in this town and now you say you have a piece of the sky in your hands? This is not a piece of the sky, it's, it's a…a piece of a machine or something." She kicked it hard and it began to shake.

"What did you do?" I asked in a panic.

"Nothing, you did it!"

"Nuh uh, you did!"

"Did not you tiny freak!"

"Did to, you Amazon!"

"Uh, guys?" Rob said.

"I should Jack-slap that beak of yours off!" Arty yelled.

"Like you could, you can't even catch me flat foot!"

"Guys!" Meg yelled.

"Admit it," Arty continued yelling. "You made this in you spare time to play a prank on us and-"

"I did no such thing, I-"

"GUYS!" Rob and Meg shouted at the same time.

Arty and I stopped arguing just long enough to turn our attention to our friends in time to see the octagonal slab rise up into the air. It was blinking bright white lights and took off towards a corn field some half mile away.

"I got it!" Rob yelled as he leapt on the shape and took off with it.

"Rob!" I yelled as the three of us chased after it.

We chased it and Rob to the corn field and beyond to the baseball field where I had won the game earlier (like a boss) and came to a stop in front of a ship. It was a strange shape, circular with an elongated front that ended in two tips. A cockpit was off to the side and its window was, of all things, Rob out of Air.

"See? I wasn't lying." I told my amigas. (That's Spanish for female friends.)

"I'm…I'm sorry I ever doubted you, Chi…Chicken Wal." Arty said.

"Yeah, well, the next time I say I saw something when I saw it, you believe me that I saw it."

I'll spare you the details but it took Arty and myself fifteen minutes to drag Meg to the ship with us to get Rob back. She was so incredibly scared of going in that she began to hyperventilate. Luckily I always carry several bags of Chicken Whizzies with me (You never know when you might need one) and gave her an empty bag so she could breathe into. But even that was not enough to get her to come in with us. Arty; however, had a plan and pulled out her cell phone.

"What am I doing here?" Con Bon asked when he arrived at the field ten minutes later. (See? I'm already using my watch. Like a boss.)

"We need you to help us with something," Arty told him.

"What?"

"Well, it's best if you see for yourself.

Rounding the wooden fence circling the baseball diamond, Arty led Con Bon to where he could see the ship. His jaw dropped at the sight of it but fortunately he only needed to be slapped once to snap him out of it. Unfortunately, I was the one who slapped him and subsequently was chased around for a few minutes until he managed to catch me and smack my already deformed cranium. (Seriously, how many times is my poor little head gonna suffer like this?)

We searched the ship up and down, left and right, even diagonally until we found Rob. He was actually playing with what looked like the controls to the ship and making rocket noises. He also added a few laser sound effects here and there.

"What's his problem?" Con asked.

"He has ADD and forgot to take his meds by the look of it," I expertly informed him. "Let's just grab him and go."

Dragging a hyper robin through a ship and trying to keep him quiet was harder than you may think, especially with Meg taking the smallest of steps behind us. Con had to carry Rob while Arty literally pushed Meg along, that is until she got the idea of having her grab onto the back on Con Bon's shirt to lead her out. (Seriously, she's scared of the dark, scared of an alien spaceship, and scared of Con Bon, but feels a teeny tiny bit braver around him. Go figure.)

We were almost out. You understand? We were almost home free when we heard a clanging behind us. We all froze like gargoyles in the daylight, like a deer caught in head lights as it's about to become street pizza, like water when it reaches the temperature of thirty-two degrees Fahrenheit (Zero degrees Celsius.) Slowly, ever so slowly, we turned around, except for Meg who a busy staring at Con Bon with pink hearts in her eyes, and saw the cause for the noise. It was a three legged, three eyed robotic egg. And it was staring right at us.

Letting out a scream, we all started to run, except for Meg who was being pulled through the air as she never let go of Con's shirt with a very content look about her, and Rob who bounced on Con's shoulders and cackled all the way. Sometimes I think Arty and I are the only normal ones we know.

"That's it," Arty yelled as we headed for the exit, "we're all gonna die! We're gonna be stuffed and mounted like an intergalactic trophy or, or, be made into a half-living host and implanted with face-hugging babies."

"Game over, man! Game over!" Rob cackled.

"We gotta move, man. We gotta move, gotta move, gotta move!" I yelled. It was then when they began to fire green lasers at us.

"Oh, no, you did not just shoot that green crap at me!" Con yelled.

Arriving at the exit, we jumped out just as the doors closed. We landed in the dirt; I personally swallowed some, and looked back at the ship as it began to hum to life. It took off into the air then turned to aim its laser guns at us.

"RUN!" I screamed.

We took off running for the town with the ship in hot pursuit. It must have sensed we were heading in that direction as it cut us off. We hurried to the cornfield and tried to hide there but it was relentless in its pursuit. It swept the area with a bright light and eventually found us lying low in a ditch.

"The school!" Arty yelled. And we followed her lead. Arriving at the building, we tried to get in through the front double doors but found them to be locked.

"Aw, man, this is it!" I yelled. "This is the end of the great and powerful Chicken Wal Cluck. I never got to my first malt. I never got to experience flight, soaring high above God's green earth and look down on it majestically before I hawk a loogie on it."

"I never got to finish my arrow I was working on!" Arty said as she grabbed my arm.

The ship began to power up its laser and we all held our breaths for our impending doom when I looked back at Arty. "By the way, I'd like to say I've always found you extremely attractive!" I then closed my eyes gave her a kiss on the lips.

"Will you two stop that and get in here?" Con Bon yelled.

"Get in where?" Looking where he was, I saw he had kicked in the doors and had gotten Rob and Meg inside. "You mean to tell me I didn't have to say and do what I did just now? You couldn't have done that a second sooner?"

"Just get in here!" Con yelled.

We entered the house and barricaded the door with whatever we could find, except for Meg as she was like static cling on Con Bon's shirt. (SERIOUSLY, WHAT IS HER DEAL?)

"What are we gonna do?" I yelled. "We're trapped!"

"I don't know!" Arty yelled back.

"I say we go down fighting," Con Bon said. "Take as many as can with us. If they bleed, we can kill them."

"Uh, I'm a thinker, not a fighter," I stuttered.

"I like fighters," Meg said as she wrapped her arms around Con Bon's waist.

Somewhere above us, Rob out of Air cackled from his spot in the shadows (I hate it when he does that.) and began to sing "It's the end of the world as we know it, and I really don't mind!"

"Great," Arty said as she put her hands on her hips. "We got a genius chicken, a butt kicking wolf, an acrobatic ninja robin, a twitterpated vixen, and I'm a hot duck, what can we do?"

Just then, the door rattled from an impact from outside. We all turned to face it and saw a large crack form in its center. Another impact occurred followed by another and another. The vending machine Con Bon moved in front of it tipped over as with the cardboard standee of the Statue of Lizardy I had placed. (Yeah, I really didn't think that one through, guys.) Anyways, it wasn't long until the door burst open and in came a trio of the three legged aliens.

"Get back, you three legged freaks!" Con Bon charged head first and punched the first one he saw. It didn't do nothing. "Bad idea." The alien zapped him and he disappeared.

"AGH! We're all gonna die!" Arty shouted.

"Con Bon?" Meg said with her lip quvering. All that was left of him was his shirt, which she gripped onto.

"Meg, come on we gotta go!"

"No, it's too late. Go on without me. Just leave me Con's shirt… a little water…a magazine if you have one-"

She too was zapped and disappeared.

"OH SNAP!" I yelled when a paper ninja star hit one of the creatures in one of its three eyes.

Dropping from the ceiling (Don't ask me how he got up there or where he found a black bandanna to tie around his eyes and a black towel to pin to his shirt.) Rob landed in front of them with a baton whirling around and shouting ninja yells. He twirled his weapon around and around expertly and struck a defensive stance before motioning for the aliens to 'Just Bring It'.

He was zapped and disappeared as well.

"Well I think we can agree fighting them is pointless," I said.

"Then there's only one thing for us to do." Walking straight up to them like a boss, Arty started the lead alien right in the eye and…gave it the puppy dog pout. Her eyes went wide and beak-lip quivered as she looked up at the creature for a moment. Needless to say, she was zapped as well.

The aliens advanced on me after that. I began to shake in my feathers as they drew close. Their lasers powered up and aimed right at me. This was it. This was how the totally awesome and downright cute Chicken Wal was going to meet the big farmer in the sky. But before I go, I was going out doing what I always loved to do.

Reaching into a pocket, I pulled out a bag of Chicken Whizzies and began to eat them. They were the most delicious Chicken Whizzies I had ever tasted. I closed my eyes and waited to disappear but something entirely unexpected happened. They grabbed my bag of Chicken Whizzies and…shared them. They were eating my bag of Chicken Whizzies! I could only stare at them as their pod-like heads opened up and strange little orange creatures giggled and laughed as they ate the snack food.

"Uhh, what, what's happening here?" I looked each of them in the eyes as they gorged on my bag of Whizzies.

"We're sorry we scared you," the lead alien said. "We just wanted your Chicken Whizzies. They're the best!"

"Yeah, we don't have these on Omicron Persei Eight," another said.

"Hey guys, look!" the third one shouted. "I found the mother load!"

Turning back around to face the destroyed door, the three aliens laid eyes on the knocked over vending machine. It was full of Chicken Whizzies and they immediately began to feed it quarters to get to the sweet treats inside.

"Wait, so, you're here just for the Chicken Whizzies?" I asked. "Then why did you hit me on my perfectly symmetrical head? And why did you disintegrate my friends?"

"Well, first of all, Chicken Whizzies are the best snack food in the universe and we can't get enough of them. And secondly, we didn't disintegrate your friends. Our teleport beams malfunctioned and instead of teleporting any available Chicken Whizzies, they sort of transported them instead.

"They're all safe," the first one said. "I can have them back here in a flash."

With the push of a button, the alien teleported my friends back. Rob out of Air looked confused, Meg was in a fetal position with Con's shirt clutched tightly to her chest, and Arty was quietly reading a magazine article on what to do in a an alien invasion.

"Well, everyone is back as promised but we sort of had a problem with this one." The second alien brought back Con Bon who was standing straight up like a soldier at attention. He even had his hair coifed with a spit curl on the front. "We uh, kinda had trouble with this one. His brainwaves got crossed and-"

"And he wrecked our holding bay," the first one said. "I won't be able to get the dents out of there and I'm sure he doesn't have any intergalactic insurance on him."

"Yes, well, anyway, if you give me a minute I can put him back the way she was."

"No!" Meg yelled as she ran up to Con. "He's not scary anymore."

"Ah, Meg dahling," he said in a southern accent and got down on one knee, "Will you be so kind as to accompany me to the debutant ball that is prom occurring here in a fortnight?"

With a squeal of happiness, she flung her arms around his neck and began shouting 'Yes!' (Oy Vay. Don't mind me, I'm just gonna face palm while I develop diabeties from all this sugar, sugar they're makin'.)

"We're sorry to have scared you so, but after we get our ship fixed as it had a piece of our cloaking device missing, we'll take off for the Chicken Whizzie factory to pick up our order and go back home," the second alien said.

"Wait a second, you placed an order for Chicken Whizzies from another galaxy and are now picking them up?" Arty asked.

"Of course," the first alien said. "Have you seen the cost of off world shipping and handling? It's outrageous!"

Happy Harbor – Three weeks later at school. I would tell you the time but I kinda broke my watch when I fell out of the alien's spaceship.

Everything was back to normal, more or less. My uncle treats me like his own son now. (Arty was right, closure really does help. Thanks Cosmoduck, you really do know men.) He even let me sign up for track here in a month.

Rob out of Air was now the captain of the gymnastic squad. (He took his medicine and now he's extremely focused.)

Meg of the Litter and Con Bon have been dating ever since that night. (Who knew he could be a perfect gentleman and yet still give me a heck of a wallop upside the head every now and then).

As for Arty and myself, well, she fell for the hero of my little story. That's me, in case you haven't been following along and if you haven't then shame on you. No soup for you tonight.

So I guess it just goes to show, kiddies, as long as you've got friends and an ample supply of Chicken Whizzies on hand, there ain't no valley high enough, and there ain't no mountain low enough. Wait, that doesn't make any sense. It's ain't no mountain high enough, ain't no valley low enough. Yeah that's it. And remember…if there's trouble, you know who to call; the name's Wal, Chicken Wal, symbol of truth, justice, and the Chicken Whizzie way. Chicken Wal, your first, last, and only line of protection against the possibility of ever running out of Chicken Whizzies.

Everything was quiet in the living space the team had gathered in hours earlier. The TV cast its light on a near empty room with the only occupier soundly sleeping on the floor face down in a puddle of drool.

"He he…Chicken Whizzies," he mumbled before smacking his lips and continued sleeping.


	8. Epilogue

Epilogue

It was the morning after the movie night. Or rather, it was after one in the afternoon. Robin was in the kitchen eating a bowl of cereal in his usual pair of sunglasses, jeans, and shirt. He was still a little sleepy but hunger got the best of him.

"Hey," Artemis said as she entered the kitchen.

"Hey," Robin said as he ate another spoonful of Lucky Charms. "Rough night?"

"Heartburn was killing me, need tums, need milk." She grabbed the jug of milk and drank straight from it. "The next time Conner makes chili dogs, we need to tell him not to put actual chili peppers in with them. Thank God he didn't put Trinidad Moruga Scorpion peppers in it this time."

"Hottest ones in the world. Who knew Kryptonians could eat those without dying from the heat."

"Greetings my friends." Kaldur said as he came into view. "I take it you had a restless sleep last night as well?"

"Restless isn't exactly the word for it," Artemis told him.

"Yeah, weird dreams," Robin said through a mouthful of cereal.

"What kind of dreams?" Kaldur asked as he reached for the box of Cocoa Puffs.

"Who's talking about dreams?" Wally asked as he joined the others. Behind him was Conner who was missing his boots and belt. His shirt was ridden up on one side but he didn't seem to notice, or care. "Geez, Supey, you look as bad as I feel."

Conner said nothing, only grunted as he reached for a box of Crunch Berries.

"Well, I for one dreamt I was King Arthur," Robin told them. "The whole Sword in the Stone thing."

"You're kidding me," Artmis said as she poured herself a bowl of frosted flakes. "I was Robin Hood."

"Kaldur? How about you?" Robin asked.

"…Nemo," the Atlantean leader confessed.

"Hah, you were a fish," Wally ribbed. "You were a little fishy fish fish."

"How about you Con?" the archer asked as she filled her mouth full of the frosted cereal.

Before he could answer, M'gann entered the kitchen while humming 'Kiss the Girl' happily. She telekinetically summoned a box of Frankenberry over to her along with a bowl. "Hi, guys. I don't know about you but I had the most wonderful dream last night where I was Ariel."

"Okay, so that makes four of us with wired dreams," Kaldur said. "Which only leaves Conner and Wally."

"You had a dream too?" M'gann asked her boyfriend. "What was it about?"

"…Hercules." Conner said quietly through a mouthful of cereal.

"What?"

"Hercules."

"Dude, you dreamt you were Hercules?" Wally laughed. "Oh, man. I had you pegged for the chicken."

"What?" Conner asked as he stared at him.

"Chicken Con, Chicken Supey." Wally laughed until a sneer form his bigger, stronger teammate brought him to a stop.

"Oh leave him be, Baywatch," Artemis told the speedster as she smacked the back of his head. "I bet you were the chicken. You're just crazy enough to have dreamt that, Chicken Wal."

"Whatever, like you know what I dream about."

The six team members each described what they dreamt about with the others laughing at the awkwardness of their sleeping fantasies. Each were slightly embarrassed in their confession but took comfort in the fact the others felt the same way.

Several weeks later it was movie time after a few more exhausting missions. Once more, the six team members, joined by a seventh in a young brunette with magical abilities, gathered around the living area and were ready for the shows to begin.

"Now, last time, we had M'gann and Wally pick the movies out," Kaldur told the team. "But this time I think it would be fair we all agree on several to watch while we recuperate from our injuries."

After several minutes, the team members came back with their choices. Wally tossed The Fast and The Furious: Tokyo Drift on the table. Artemis and M'gann chose Banditas. Robin, Zatanna and Kaldur picked Ghostbusters. And Conner…Conner came back with Talladega Nights: The ballad of Ricky Bobby.

Several Hours later, the seven teammates were asleep in the living quarters with the TV displaying nothing but static. Wally was sprawled out on the floor with a giant Pixie stick in one hand and a Pepsi in the other. Conner and M'gann were both lying asleep on the couch. Robin was snoozing with Zatanna's legs across his as they shared the other smaller couch. Kaldur slept soundly on the floor at Wally's feet. And Artemis had once again staked out the recliner.

The inside of the cave may have been quiet, but the minds of the teen superheroes were anything but, as they began to dream.

Fin

**Thanks for reading, commenting, and reviewing, and I really hoped you enjoyed what my twisted mind came up with here. I may do a sequel to this after I finish the fourth part of my Ultimate Spider-Man Saga as it was fun parodying these films. As always, comments, reviews, and suggestions are appreciated. (Except for negative ones.)**

**Movie list:**

**Kaldur: Finding Tula – Finding Nemo**

**Robin: The Cowl in the Stone – The Sword in the Stone.**

**Artemis: Arty Hood – Robin Hood**

**M'gann: The Little Martian – The Little Mermaid**

**Conner: Concules – Hercules**

**Wally: Chicken Wal – Chicken Little**


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